


Dancing On My Own

by Hopelessly_Obsessed



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Earn Your Happy Ending, F/M, Post-Olympics, So much angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-21
Updated: 2018-08-06
Packaged: 2019-05-26 06:20:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 24,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14994704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hopelessly_Obsessed/pseuds/Hopelessly_Obsessed
Summary: Tessa looks up. The light has finally turned green and she puts her foot on the gas. Right as she is crossing the intersection, out of the corner of her eye she sees the bright lights of a truck coming towards her and everything goes black.or when a tragic accident occurs, Scott is left to pick up the pieces and reflect on the past.





	1. In an Instant Everything Has Changed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As a disclaimer this is purely fiction and I just thought of the idea and went for it. That being said this is going to be really angsty, with some fluff at the end so enjoy the ride!

As Tessa sits at the stoplight, a shiver goes through her body and she rolls up the window in her car from the slight breeze. It’s early June and with the sun just beginning to set, it can still get a bit cooler at night.

Tessa is on her way to meet Scott for dinner at their favorite restaurant in Montreal. After the Olympics they have both decided to stay in Montreal for a while. They didn’t exactly stay here for each other, but they didn’t not stay here for each other either. Tessa is hoping to continue with school and Scott is doing some coaching at Gadbois, both telling themselves that it is the main reason for staying, but they both know there’s more to it.

It’s complicated with them. It always has been. They are Tessa and Scott, two halves of a whole, but sometimes it can be a bit hard to dissect their well… complex relationship.

They’re not exactly together or dating, if you could even call it that after being in each other's lives for almost 21 years, but they are just… living is what Tessa would call it, even though she knows that is a drastic understatement.

Their relationship is messy because of course there is a lot of history after 21 years, but they are in the process of navigating that. Ever since the comeback, when they both agreed that there would be no distractions and that included significant others, something changed in their relationship. Sure they have kissed before, but they never crossed that other boundary, sex.

The comeback allowed them to restore their somewhat damaged relationship post Sochi and their relationship was the best that it has ever been. They began spending most of their free time together outside of skating, not because they had to but because they wanted too. However, they still never crossed that final boundary, not yet anyway. Despite that, there were still gazes held longer than they should, hands lingering a little too long in places that are definitely not platonic and nights spent falling asleep together on the couch (sometimes even the bed), but they just passed it off to others (and themselves) that this was just because of their long shared history and that they are just best friends.

And they were smart to not get into anything that could be so messy while training for something as important as the Olympics. But, it was inevitable that it would happen, everyone knew it would. A moment of lost control and bliss from winning the Olympics was just the excuse for a moment that was bound to happen.

One minute they were dancing in Canada House and the next they were in bed, his hands all over her and vice versa. It just happened and kept on happening since the Olympics.

Okay, well it didn’t just happen because of course there were feelings there throughout the entire comeback, there always had been for that matter, but it was finally something that they could actually explore.

They were able to keep it separate, work and personal. But then family members began to notice the change in their relationship, even before they slept together, and the questions of are they dating became inevitable. When they first were asked those questions it dawned on Tessa that they honestly didn’t really know what they were themselves. Were they dating now? Were they just friends with benefits? What if we have feelings, what is it then?

Obviously, it’s never just friends with benefits and that would totally degrade the intensity of their partnership and all they have been through, so what exactly is it? Tessa still doesn’t know and she’s not sure Scott does either.

They are best friends who see each other everyday and sometimes (okay a lot of the time) kiss and have sex. And on top of that Tessa is pretty sure she loves Scott. Not in the platonic “I’m his skating and business partner” kind of way, but in love with Scott. Like the type of love that she was so sure was only found in the cheesy rom coms that Scott loves.

So now she’s waiting for the stoplight to turn green as she’s on her way to meet Scott at their favorite restaurant that also happens to be one of the most romantic restaurants in Montreal and to top that off she has just decided that tonight’s the night that she’s going to tell Scott how she really feels about their whole situation. Basically she’s going to pour her heart out to him and tell him that she’s hopelessly in love with him and wants to spend the rest of her life with him and hope he feels the same way. And wow does she hope he feels the same way because there is also another _small_ detail she is leaving out, but that is another story.

Tessa can’t believe this is her life right now. If you would have told her ten years ago, hell even four years ago, that she would be planning on professing her love to Scott Moir she would have laughed out loud, but now she’s not laughing and she’s incredibly serious.

Tessa looks up. The light has finally turned green and she puts her foot on the gas. Right as she is crossing the intersection, out of the corner of her eye she sees the bright lights of a truck coming towards her and everything goes black.

 

* * *

 

Scott nervously glances around the restaurant and looks down at his watch. It’s ten after seven, ten minutes after Tessa was supposed to meet him at the restaurant. For anyone else he would pass it off as they were caught up in traffic or just plain old running late. Except Tessa never is running late because she is never late. Period. So now all sorts of scenarios run through Scott’s head.

 _What if she got sick of me and just decided to bail? What if she met a guy and doesn’t want to continue whatever messy relationship we have? What if she figured out I was planning on telling her how I really feel,_ He thinks.

He takes a sip of his water and checks his phone to see if there are any messages from Tessa. There isn’t. Usually if she is late (Scott could count the number of times on his hand, even if he’s known her 21 years) she would leave a message.

He decides to give her a call because maybe she _is_ just running late and totally forgot to let him know. He press on her contact and puts the phone up to his ear and hears the dial. It rings and rings and she still doesn’t pick up.

He hears Tessa’s familiar voice, “This is Tessa. Sorry I missed your call, please leave a message and I’ll get back to you as soon as possible. Thanks!”

His face drops as he sets his phone face down onto the table. Where could she be? He thinks.

The waiter stops by and asks him if anyone else will be joining him. Any other day he would be embarrassed if someone thought he was being bailed on, but today he’s too busy thinking about Tessa.

Scott tries to think back to anything she may have said earlier in the week. Maybe she told him she couldn’t make it tonight and he didn’t remember. Maybe she’s just at a work dinner and doesn’t have access to her phone. Yes, that’s it, it’s got to be.

That thought reminds Scott about how proud he is of her. Of course they both contributed to their success and are very talented people in their own right and them winning the Olympics is how they were both brought into the public eye, but there is so much that Tessa has accomplished on her own that most people don’t even know. He smiles at the thought at how successful she has become and is so grateful that he is apart of her life in some way, even though they have a lot to figure out with their relationship.

Scott was hoping to finally tell Tessa how he really feels tonight, but her absence is leaving a pit in his stomach. Something feels off about tonight and he doesn’t know what. He knows that Tessa cares about him and they wouldn’t be doing what they are doing if she didn’t, so that’s not what is causing this weird feeling he has, but rather something else that he can’t quite put a finger on.

His thoughts are cut off however, when he suddenly becomes aware that his phone is ringing where it sits on the table in front of him.

When he picks up the phone he sees that it’s Tessa, he can’t help the grin that spreads across his face. When he says hello, it is not Tessa’s voice he hears.

“Hello, this is Doctor Stevens at Montreal General Hospital and I noticed that you recently tried calling this number to contact Tessa Virtue, is that correct?” Doctor Stevens says into the other end of the phone call.

“Yes, I did this is a… I’m Tessa’s… Uh I’m Scott. Scott Moir. Um where’s Tess? Why can’t she call me?” Scott says frantically, trying ignore his now pounding heart.

“There’s been an accident.” Doctor Stevens replies almost too calmly, like he’s done this many times before. Like he is used to giving the kind of news that tears people apart, like it’s tearing him apart right now. “You should come meet her at the hospital right away.”

“Uh, okay.” Scott says dazed, almost zombie like. He’s in shock and doesn’t really know how to feel because he has no clue what’s even going on right now. “What happened is she okay? I… what’s going on?”

“I’m not legally allowed to go into detail on the phone. All I can say is that she has been in an accident, but I see you are listed as one of her emergency contacts so I can go into detail when you get here”

“Oh… uh okay. I’ll be there in ten minutes.” Scott replies unevenly. He tries to take deep breaths as he hangs up the phone and goes to get into his car. He looks down at his shaking hands and he doesn’t know if he will be able to drive. But, nevertheless he gets into his car because it’s Tessa and she needs him right now.

As he drives to the hospital he does everything in his power to not throw up because that pit in his stomach has just grown a hell of a lot bigger.

 

* * *

 

Scott arrives at the hospital shorty after and he sprints frantically into the emergency room. He looks around for any sign of Tessa, his vision becoming blurry from the tears threatening to fall from his eyes. He’s about to call out her name, but before he can make a sound, a nurse comes up to him.

“Can I help you sir?” the nurse asks calmly.

“I um… I’m looking for someone. Her names Tessa. Tessa Virtue.” Scott is able to get out, but his words come very shaky. “She… she was in an accident. I don’t even know what happened. She was supposed to meet me for dinner and…” he rambles on with something that is inaudible to the nurse.

“Okay, let me see if I can find…” the nurse starts to say, but is interrupted when Scott breaks into a sprint as he sees Tessa laying on a hospital bed that a couple nurses are pulling out of the emergency room. He runs up to the bed and reaches out to grab her hand. His heart stops when he notices that she doesn’t react to his touch.

 _Oh my God, she's not awake._ He thinks. _Oh Tess what happened?_

He reaches down and brushes his hands across her face, looking for any sign of alertness. When she still doesn’t react, his hands begin to shake again and he looks up at the doctor, who he assumes is Doctor Stevens, and silently asks the impending question, is she alive?

“Scott I’m assuming, I’m Doctor Stevens.” He says introducing himself.

“Where are you taking her? What happened? I wasn’t there why wasn’t I with her I should have just drove her like we always do, why…” Scott starts to ramble again, his breath uneven, but the doctor stops him.

“Scott, we are taking Tessa to get a CT scan to see if she has any internal bleeding, given the severity of the injuries she sustained in the accident.” Doctor Stevens begins to explain. “All we know is that it was a hit and run. The driver ran a red light as she was crossing the intersection, the police said it might have been a drunk driver, but that’s all they know now. Right now we need to focus on Tessa okay. She will probably need surgery but the CT scan will help us determine the severity. She also sustained a head injury in the crash, so we will be taking her for a head scan as well. It could only turn out to be a concussion, but there could potentially be a brain bleed as well, so it is important that we take her right away.”

The doctors words have mostly flown over Scott's head, as he is only focused on Tessa. Tessa his skating partner, his best friend, the love of his life. He needs her to be okay, she has to be okay. And it kills him that the only thing he can do right now his hold her unresponsive hand.

“Scott? Did you hear me?” Doctor Stevens questions.

“Yeah, uh okay.” is all Scott manages to get out.

“We have take your girlfriend…”

“Uh, she's my um skating partner or friend a… just not my girlfriend.”

“Okay we have to take Tessa to get her scans now, but as soon as they are done I will come and update you before her surgery. Okay?” The doctor gets out before Scott can stop him again. Scott tells him that it’s okay to take her now and makes the doctor promise to update him before she goes to surgery. Before they take Tessa away, Scott bends down and presses a soft kiss to Tessa’s forehead and whispers I love you to her.

A nurse leads him into the waiting room and he is left with is impending worries. Just the sight alone of seeing Tessa lying limp in that hospital bed made him sick to his stomach. She looked tiny and helpless and it made her almost look like she was seven years old again. That thought causes Scott to think back to when he was just nine years old and he had just met Tessa for the first time. He allows himself to escape back to that time because anything is better than having to sit here and worry about Tessa.

 

* * *

 

_Scott is a nine year old boy who loves to skate. Whether it be playing hockey or ice dancing, even if that meant wearing silly costumes sometimes. He is good at hockey but he likes to figure skate too. His family is big into ice dance, so he guesses that he has to be too, even though he likes hockey more sometimes. His older brothers Danny and Charlie skated too, so it can’t be so bad._

_Today Aunt Carol told him that he had to do one more tryout with another girl. Scott complained to his mom when she told him. He has skated with so many other girls and it’s not fun to hold other girls hands all the time, especially because they have cooties._

_“But Mom,” Scott said with the word mom being dragged out. “I don’t wanna dance with another girl. They are never any good and I have hockey practice today.”_

_“Oh Scotty, one more tryout. I promise if this one doesn’t work out then we can be all done looking for partners.” his mom replies back to a pouting Scott. He reluctantly agrees, but only because is mom told him that Aunt Carol said that it was Tessa Virtue he would be trying out with. Scott met Tessa earlier this year at skating camp and she seemed nice for a seven year old and she was a good skater. He didn’t get to talk to her much at camp because she didn’t really talk much. But he is still excited to get to see her again because she doesn’t seem as annoying as some of the other girls at camp._

_Scott’s mom drives him to the rink later that day and he actually is feeling excited to get to skate with Tessa._

_They get to the rink early and he begins to do a few warm up laps. After a few minutes he spots Tessa walk in with her mother. She is gripping her moms hand tightly and has her puffy winter coat hood pulled down so low over her head that Scott could barely see her eyes. She looked nervous. Like really nervous and Scott had to try really really hard not to let out a laugh. He should really be nice to Tessa because she’s younger than him, he thinks, so he doesn’t laugh. And she is really nice so he should give her a chance._

_Scott continues to skate laps as Tessa is talking with Aunt Carol. She looks so little and cocky nine year old Scott wonders if she will be able to keep up with him._

_When Tessa’s mom finally convinces her to get out onto the ice, Scott looks over and notices her bright pink ballerina skating dress and looks down at his sweats and hockey jersey and doesn’t know how well they will get along._

_Tessa skates over to him as Aunt Carol tells them to skate around and do some warm up laps together. She really is a good skater for a seven year old, Scott thinks._

_He smiles at her for the first time as she approaches him and her bright green eyes light up as she gives him a shy smile back._

_Granted, Scott is only nine years old, but at that moment he hopes he can make her eyes light up like that every day of his life._

_“Hi,” Scott says confidently. “I’m Scott.”_

_“I know.” Tessa replies quietly, almost in a whisper. “I’m Tessa.”_

_“I know.” Scott responds back in a joking voice. “Let’s skate.”_

 

* * *

 

“Scott. Scott.” Someone says, while gently shaking Scott's shoulder. He jolts up from the position he was sitting in on his chair in the waiting room. He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn’t even notice Doctor Stevens approaching him. Scott can’t quite read the doctors expression, but he braces himself for the bad news that he guesses is coming. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Comments and kudos are greatly appreciated!


	2. Please Tell Me Everything's Going to Be Alright

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all your comments and kudos. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Also as far as the medical stuff, I'm in no way a doctor so most of my medical knowledge comes from watching every season of grey's anatomy (haha).

“Is… is Tessa alright?” Scott stutters, as he still doesn’t have a clue what’s going on with Tess or if she will even be alright. “ Does she need surgery?”

“She, Tessa, has a deep laceration on her chest from the impact of glass from the crash so we will be repairing that in surgery. But, the good news is that she doesn’t have any internal bleeding there so that’s the good news.” The doctor explains to Scott, but with a hint that there is something more to come.

“Okay, okay that’s good.” Scott manages to say, his whole body still shaking. “What’s the bad news?”

“Well, we saw something on her head scan and it appears to be a subdural hematoma, which is basically a brain bleed that is caused from a severe head injury, in Tessa’s case a car crash. So we will need to operate right away before it becomes life threatening.” Doctor Stevens says seriously. “She will need a craniotomy in which we will remove a part of the skull to create room for the brain to swell.”

“Um… Oh God. I… I can’t lose her oh my God.” Scott struggles to articulate his thoughts that are now flooding his brain. “Is she going to be okay? Is she going to wake up? I can’t lose her, I can’t. You have to make her better please.”

“I know this sounds scary Scott, but this procedure is very common for our neurosurgeons to perform and the odds are very good, however after the surgery it may be a few hours until she wakes up or a few weeks, it just depends on how her brain will react. But Tessa needs this surgery, so is there anyone you can call…” Doctor Stevens explains, but is interrupted by Scott again.

“Oh no. Her mom. Tessa’s mom. I didn’t call her. Why didn’t I call her. she should be here. She lives in London and...and…” Scott starts to say.

“It’s going to be okay Scott. How about we’ll both go and see Tessa before her surgery and you can call her mom in a minute. How does that sound.” Doctor Stevens asks Scott.

“Okay, yeah that sounds good.” Scott says almost dazed. He feels like he’s in a dream, no wait a nightmare, except it’s real and he doesn’t have any control on the outcome. He follows the doctor wordlessly in his almost zombie like state while trying to keep his bile down that is threatening to come up.

When he sees Tessa in the hospital room his heart falls to the pit of his stomach and the tears begin to fall down his cheeks, leaving streaks of hot tears across his face.

“Oh Tess.” Scott says almost inaudibly as he reaches her. He finally gets a good look at her, unlike earlier. He sees several cuts across her face, the blood cleaned off, but still noticeable, and bruising beginning to show on her face and the rest of her body. He places his hands lightly to her face, carefully so he doesn’t hurt her anymore than she already is. He places a kiss on her forehead.

“I love you so much Tess.” Scott says quietly. “I know you’ll get through this, we’ll get through this. Now go and get better, I’ll be waiting right here for you.”

Doctor Stevens escorts Scott back to the waiting room to wait for Tessa’s surgery to be done. He has a long night ahead of him, in which there will most likely be very little sleep involved and a lot of worry.

“You should call Tessa’s family now. Let them know what’s going on and tell them to call me with any questions.” he says while handing Scott his business card. “Is there anyone you can call in the meantime to come be with you. A friend maybe?”

“Uh yeah, Patch and Marie. I… I’ll call them.” Scott says shakily. The doctor makes sure Scott is alright before he goes to Tessa surgery and leaves Scott to make his calls.

He calls Kate first and doesn’t make it through the greeting before he begins to cry again and he tries his best to inform Kate on the condition of her daughter. She tells him that she will be on the first flight tomorrow morning and tells him that she loves him before hanging up the phone. He takes a few minutes to steady himself before calling Patch and Marie. Now that everything that the doctor has told him is starting to settle in, he barely can even manage to tell Marie where he is. When she understands that he is at the hospital, she rushes there and leaves Patch at home to care for Billie.

“Scott.” Marie says when she arrives to the hospital waiting room. “What happened?”

“There… there was an accident and Tessa, she’s hurt, she’s really hurt and… ” but he is shaking again and hot tears begin to stream down his face once again and Marie comes over to give him a hug. “I can’t lose her Marie. I can’t.”

“Don’t say that.” She says. “She will be fine. She’s strong, she will be fine.” Marie tells Scott, but is really trying to convince herself the same thing. They stay that way, in a hug, while Marie rocks Scott back and forth and he feels like he’s a kid again when his mom would comfort him after a scraped knee, except this is far worse than a scraped knee and is rather the kind of pain that could kill him, he’s sure of that.

When the Doctor finally comes back to the waiting room after four hours of misery, he tells Scott and Marie that the surgery was successful and had no complications, but it is still unknown when Tessa will actually wake up.

Doctor Stevens leads them to Tessa’s room and Scott’s heart pains to see Tessa like this. She is lying in the hospital bed, her bruises showing more now, and she now has a wrap around her head from the brain surgery. Scott makes his way towards her and places another kiss on her forehead.

The doctor leaves the room to give them some privacy and Marie takes a seat in the corner of the room, her eyes not leaving Scott. Scott takes a chair and places it directly beside Tessa and grabs her hand. It’s cold, the one thing that is Tessa right now. Her hands are always cold and he thinks back to the time he first grabbed her hand in that cold ice rink in Ilderton and desperately hopes that she will wake up and be able to hold his hand like that again.

 

* * *

_“Let’s skate.” He says and after he reaches out for her hand. She looks up at him kind of weird and then hesitantly grabs his hand. It’s small and it’s soft and it’s cold. But, right away he takes a liking to holding hands with Tessa, even though girls have cooties and he doesn’t like holding their hands, but with Tessa it’s different._

_They begin to skate a couple laps and he can hear the oohs and ahhs from his Aunt and Tessa’s mom. Scott is confused to why they are so excited about them skating together. All they are doing is skating laps._

_Okay it is pretty fun and in the little time he has been skating with Tessa, she has been better than the other girls and can actually keep up with him. And it really is nice to hold her hand and he hopes his isn’t sweating at all because from what his brothers have told him, girls think sweaty hands are gross and he doesn’t want Tessa to think he’s gross._

_He actually does hope she wants to keep skating with him because he knows that the first thing he is going to tell his mom when he gets off the ice is that he wants to skate with Tessa._

_And so soon after it is decided. Tessa and Scott will skate together and their parents seem completely overjoyed, maybe a little too overjoyed, but that’s okay because Scott is happy that he finally has a partner and Tessa is happy she can skate._

_They continue holding hands day after day and little nine year old Scott decides that he wants to try and hold Tessa’s hand for as long as he can._

_As the awkward little kids they are, they don’t really talk much outside of when they need to at the rink. Jordan, Tessa’s older sister and Scott’s cousin, decide that it would be funny if Scott and Tessa dated. So they set them up and still they don’t talk. Eventually, they grow out of that faze (and dating) and are able to become best friends._

_When Tessa gets an offer to go to the National Ballet, Scott is devastated because then he won’t be able to hold Tessa’s hand again or worse not get to skate with her._

_When Tessa tells Scott that she is turning down the ballet he is confused._

_“Why aren’t you going tutu?” Scott says using the nickname he has given her._

_“Because we already said we would be skating partners.” She states like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. Scott’s just happy he gets to keep skating with Tess and even happier that he gets to continue to hold her hand a little longer._

 

* * *

 

Scott opens his eyes slowly when he hears whispers coming from inside the room. He’s confused at first when his surroundings don’t look familiar. He soon remembers where he is when he looks over and sees Tessa, still with her eyes closed. He feels his stomach tighten up again and now notices how swollen his eyes feel from crying.

He looks up and notices that the morning light is already peeking through the curtains in the hospital room.

_I must have fallen asleep_ , he thought.

He turns his attention to the whispers coming from the corner of the room and they stop when he turns his head. It’s Kate and Marie talking and when they notice him looking over Kate speaks to him first.

“Oh Scott. Come here.” He does as she says and makes his way over to Kate and she engulfs him in a hug. Scott tries to stop the tears from falling yet again, but is unsuccessful. He feels something wet fall onto his shoulder assumes it’s from his tears, but when he hears her sniffle he realizes that it is instead from Kate who was also unable to stop her tears from falling.

“I’m so sorry.” Scott says in between sobs. “I… I should have been with her. We always drive together and yesterday we didn’t and it’s… it’s all my fault.”

“No honey, please don’t. It’s no ones fault but that person who hit Tessa.” Kate tries to comfort him. “It’s going to be okay Scott. Tessa’s going to be okay. We just have to have hope.”

“I just don’t know how much hope I can have right now. I… she just needs to be alright. I don’t even know how I’ll… she just needs to be okay alright.” Scott is talking in circles, he knows that. But it’s really damn hard to think clearly when the love of his life is laying in a hospital bed fighting for her life and he can’t do a damn thing about it.

Kate sits by Tessa’s bed for awhile and Jordan does as too when she arrives. Marie is there as well. Mostly just to make sure Scott is okay, but she too sits and holds Tessa’s hand once and while.

Kate, Jordan, and Marie try to convince Scott to go and take a break and get some food with them. But he won’t, he can’t. He knows in his head that it’s not his fault, but in this current situation he can’t leave Tessa’s side because last time he did she got hurt and he will never let that happen again. He hopes he has the chance to never let that happen again because that would mean that she would be awake. But right now, Scott is trying to have hope like Kate said, but he is having a hard time believing that.

So Kate, Jordan, and Marie leave to go get food (how can they even eat right now) and Scott is left alone with Tessa again. His stomach has been physically aching ever since he got a call from the doctor and so now that he is finally alone, he empties the contents of his stomach into a nearby garbage can.

That didn’t really help and now he feels even worse. His throat aches from the bile and his stomach is still churning.

Scott presses his fingers to his temple and closes his eyes slowly. They are heavy from being swollen from all the crying and so he decides to take a seat next to Tessa’s bed to rest his eyes. He lays his head next to her arm and lets his heavy eyelids fall.

_How is this our story?_ He thinks. _Why when we could finally be together this is what happens? This can’t be the end. After all we’ve been through. The fights, the surgeries, the blood, sweat and tears and all the in between._

She has to be okay. She has to be. He doesn’t know if you could live in a world without Tessa Virtue. He has barely even known a time when Tessa wasn’t there. Almost all of his greatest memories are with Tessa and if she’s not there anymore he doesn’t know how he’ll continue. It’s like they need each other to breathe and ever since the accident he hasn’t been able to catch his breath. He needs her. She’s the best part of him and what makes him, well him. Without her what’s the point?

He hasn’t even gotten the chance to tell her how he really feels about their whole relationship. What if he never gets the chance. He doesn’t know how he could move on to someone else, let alone even live without having Tess in his life.

Despite his anxious state, Scott begins to feel himself drifting off and he's beginning to succumb to the sleepiness. As he is falling asleep he remembers back to how far they’ve come since being naive teenagers.

 

* * *

 

_After Tessa and Scott became official skating partners, everything went great. They were the best pair at the Ilderton skating club and were on track to becoming the best in the world (even if Scott didn’t know it at the time)._

_At thirteen and fifteen they moved an hour away from their homes to train at Kitchener-Waterloo. Away from their school, their friends, and their family._

_Scott has always been told he had to look after Tessa, but this time he was taking the job seriously because after all they are each other's family now._

_Most of their friends thought they were crazy, but Scott just considered this the next move. There was always a next for them in terms of skating. First find a partner, next train, next start practicing programs, next win competitions. So this next step just seemed like the next plausible thing to do._

_And so they were off. Off to work towards their dream of the Olympics one day, something that they have talked about more often these days._

_Scott will admit he has been worrying a lot about making sure Tess is alright with this new move and how it is the right thing for their partnership, but he hasn’t had much time to think about how he feels._

_He is a little disappointed to be leaving his high school and all his friends, but he knows it will pay off in the end. And it isn’t about the distance from his family. Of course he’ll miss them, but he will still see them on weekends and many visits from them. It’s more about the dream finally becoming real, this just being the first step. And if he’s honest with himself, he’s a little nervous. He knows they’re good, that he’s good, but he’s nervous about the fact that they could at one point become so close to having it all, but just not close enough. He’s not sure if he could handle that himself and definitely not with letting down Tessa._

_The move has gone well thus far. They are skating well and they haven’t had too many bad patches in their relationship other than a few quarrels._

_Tessa and Scott spend a lot of time together because Scott has promised to look after her and they have been getting along quite well lately. Scott finds himself joking with Tessa a lot because that is what makes her smile and her smile is the best thing in the world, Scott thinks._

_Except there’s has been a slight shift in their relationship. Nothing sudden, more like slowly building up. But, one day seems to change the course of their, well more personal relationship outside of skating for the next few years. It’s over a phone conversation of all things._

_“Hey Scott!” Tessa says on the other line of the phone. “I was thinking tonight you could come over and we could order some pizza and maybe watch a movie.”_

_“I’m sorry kiddo, I can’t tonight.” Scott replies back, using his new nickname for her. She refuses to let him call her tutu anymore, so Scott came up with a new name because he is older and always likes to remind her of that, jokingly of course._

_“Oh, okay. Why?” Tessa questions._

_“Um… I sorta have a date. With Stacy from school.”_

_“Okay, well I’ll see you at practice then tomorrow.” Tessa’s says sounding hurt. She quickly hangs up the phone before Scott even has the chance to say goodbye and his stomach feels like he has been punched in the gut._

_Scott likes to spend time with Tessa. Okay he loves spending time with Tess. Sure they have different interests and are incredibly different people at times, but they have always got along. But lately something has felt different. Like when she’s hugging him he doesn’t want to let go. Or when they are just sitting on the couch at one of their host families houses, he has the urge to kiss her. But, he can’t be feeling like that. He has to protect her and everyone always tells him she’s like his little more mature sister and he can’t kiss his sister because that would be gross. So he has started to create distance between himself and Tessa when they aren’t on the ice. He knows it’s not fair to her, but he doesn't know what else to do and they have a goal that they need to stay focused on._

_This faze of the awkward teenage years of figuring out how to act around Tessa has Scott wrapping his brain for a solution and it is a struggle for Scott on more occasions that he can count._

_There are certainly times he isn’t sure their partnership will succeed and that doesn’t help the matter either. So Scott has started to try and busy himself outside of skating with girlfriends, which he can tell bothers Tessa. Recently, he has noticed her looking at him in the same way he is sure he looked at her before he was able to control himself a bit more, but not completely._

_There are times when they almost kiss and hands or hugs held a little too long, even in these awkward teenage years. There are also times when they fight and drift apart. But they always come back to each other because they are family._

_Monday at school Scott approaches his locker and sees Tessa at hers right next to his._

_“Hey T,” Scott starts. “I really am sorry about Friday.”_

_“It’s okay Scott. It’s okay for you to have other friends. I can’t keep you to myself all the time.” Tessa replies back and he tries not to think about the sadness in her voice. He feels bad, he really does. Tessa is having a harder time making friends than him and he did promise to take care of her, but at the same time he won’t always be around. To be fair it was a boring date and he probably would have had a better time with Tess, so he tells her that._

_“To make you feel better it totally sucked and I would have rather we hung out.” He says back to her, while trying to ignore the red that creeps into Tessa’s cheeks as she tries to hide her reaction._

_“Ha. Well you can make it up to me by helping me with my speech for class.”_

_“Only if you help me with my math homework.” He replies laughing._

_And even though they have their fights or don’t always agree and despite all of the other struggles and navigating a time in their life when they are figuring out who they are, they always end up back with each other. And even better right now they are skating great. Incredible even. They have moved up the scale to juniors and are on their way to achieving their dream of the Olympics, despite how far off it may seem, this dream is now seeming closer and closer to becoming reality._

 

* * *

 

Scott suddenly awakens to the sound of loud beeping and quickly flashes open his eyes when he realizes that the sound is the beeping from Tessa's heart rate monitor. Doctors come rushing in and Scott nearly passes out as he hears a nurse say her vitals are dropping and he is rushed out of the room, the door slamming in his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! The next update will be up in a few days! Like always comments and kudos are greatly appreciated!


	3. Waiting Here For You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all your comments and kudos! Here is the next chapter, enjoy!

Scott’s pulse is racing as he tries to control his breathing. One second He was sleeping next to a stable Tessa and the next he awoke to Tessa crashing right in front of him. He didn’t even have time to process what was happening before he was ushered out of the room by a nurse.

Now he is sitting on a chair outside of her room, his leg moving up and down from this nerves. He should really go and find Kate and Jordan, but he doesn’t have the energy to do so and he won’t leave Tess.

He feels his stomach tighten in to knots again partly from anxiety and the other part from not eating. He knows he needs to take care of himself, but right now he doesn’t need to focus on himself because Tessa is 15 feet away in the next room fighting for her life.

He hears the sound of a defibrillator coming from inside the room and that’s what does it. He runs over to the nearest trash can and hurls once more.

Tears stream down his face. _Please don’t take her, please don’t take her_ , Scott pleads, rocking back and forth on his chair, his hands pressing against his face.

Right then Kate, Jordan, and Marie walk into the hallway. Their faces go white as they realize what’s happening.

“Oh my God.” Jordan exclaims audibly while Marie walks over and puts her hands on Scott's shoulder as he cries.

A moment later the on call doctor emerges from the room and everyone turns their heads towards the door. Scott lifts his head slowly from Marie's shoulder and looks up at the doctor, his eyes pleading for answers. He can’t read the doctors face, she must have had a lot of practice concealing her emotions.

“We got Tessa’s vitals back to normal. Her heart briefly stopped, but we were able to start it again and she is doing fine now. You can go in the room now. I am going to go get Doctor Stevens and he can update you as soon as he is available.” The doctor explains. Scott stands up and is followed by Marie. Kate grabs Jordan's hand and she reaches for Scott's hand so they can all walk in together. Scott gives her a sad smile and they brace themselves for what awaits them in the room.

Tessa doesn’t look good. The color has drained from her face once again, making the black and blue bruises show more clearly on her face. She looks tired too, like she hasn’t slept in ages. Except she's been asleep for two days and won’t wake up. They all let out a collective gasp as they approach her. Scott drops Jordan hand and is left stunned in the middle of the hospital room, unable to move. Jordan looks back at him and gives him a look he isn’t exactly sure of the meaning.

“Oh Tessa honey,” Kate says to her daughter. “Don’t give up yet. Please come back to me.”

“Mom.” Jordan whispers, trying to tell her she needs to be careful what she says around Scott. Kate looks at Jordan and then at Scott. She decides it’s best not to say anything and takes a seat in the chair next to Tessa.

“It’s gonna be alright.” Jordan says to Tessa and maybe is even trying to convince herself as well. Jordan the moves away from Tessa and heads in the direction where Scott is standing.

“Come on,” she says to Scott while grabbing his arm. “Let’s go for a walk.” Scott opens his mouth to argue, but decides he doesn’t have the energy too. He doesn’t want to leave Tess, but it looks like her mom has got it covered for now and he needs to get a handle on his emotions, so he nods his head to Jordan and they make their way to the door.

“Keep an eye on my mom, okay?” Jordan whispers to Marie on her way out the door.

“Of course.” Marie says as she goes and takes a seat on the other side of Tessa.

Jordan leads Scott outside. The Virtue and Moir siblings have been close ever since Scott and Tessa started skating together. They had to be since their families spent so much time together at competitions and whatnot. So Scott and Jordan are fairly close and she’s almost like a sister to him. In the past she was one of the first people to go and talk to him after he and Tessa had a fight and he knows she would always be there for him if he ever needed anything. In fact, he’s grateful to have her here with him right now.

They walk on the paths around the hospital in silence until Jordan speaks up.

“Are you alright Scott?” Jordan asks. “I know it’s been a little crazy so we haven't really gotten the chance to talk.”

“Am I alright?” Scott scoffs. “Of course I’m not alright. Tessa’s in a fucking coma fighting for her damn life and it’s all my fault.”

“Calm down okay. I’m just trying to talk to you. And of course it’s not your fault stop blaming yourself.” Jordan replies softly. “I know it’s hard for you but you need to stop putting all of this on you and start taking care of yourself because Tessa wouldn’t want you to be blaming yourself and neglecting your health and not eating, especially because of whatever weird relationship you guys have now a days.”

He listens to Jordan even though it feels like his brain is on another planet right now, an alternate universe perhaps. But, what she doesn’t understand is that how can he take care of himself when it is his fault that Tessa is in that hospital bed right now.

“You don’t understand Jordan.” Scott pleads. “It _is_ my fault because I’m sure she’s told you, but yes we have been you know… sleeping together. But, you know and I know and Tessa knows that it is so much more than that and that’s why I didn’t drive her like I usually do. I was going to finally tell her how I really feel and I was nervous I was going to mess it up and… and I told her to just meet me there and then this happens. So of course it’s my fault or maybe this is just all some fucked up message from the universe that maybe we aren’t supposed to be together.” Finally admitting this aloud, tips Scott over the edge and he’s on the verge of breaking down again.

“Oh, Scott. You know that isn’t true. It’s not your fault it’s that dumb ass who ran the red. And everyone knows you’re made for each other. When Tessa wakes up and I tell her this she’s gonna laugh in our faces when I tell her that you said that you guys weren’t meant for each other because she loves you, she told me that.” Jordan says to Scott. “In the non platonic way I might add.”

“Scott, I know it’s hard to understand right now why bad things happen, because believe me I am having a damn hard time with it as well, but sometimes bad things just happen. And it's hard, I know its hard, but I have hope that Tessa can get through this, that you can all get through this because you two are the strongest people I know.”

“Thanks Jordan. I really needed this.” Scott replies before engulfing her in a heartwarming hug. She is so similar to Tessa, that he almost forgets for a moment what is really happening and that it’s not Tess he’s hugging.

“We should head back up. The doctor should be back soon to update us on Tess.” Jordan says softly.

“Okay.” Scott replies, breaking the hug. They make their way back up to the room and Jordan motions for everyone to give Scott some privacy. Jordan gives Tessa a quick kiss on the cheek and heads out of the room as well.

Scott sits down on the bed next to Tessa and adjusts himself slowly so he is now laying right beside her on the bed, being careful to not hurt her. He gracefully wraps his arms around her body and plants a soft kiss in her hair.

The tears begin to fall again, hot and wet as they fall down his cheeks. This is probably the most he has cried in his life which suits the situation when his life is literally in his arms right now. His life being Tessa. It’s not even an exaggeration though. She really is his life. There wasn’t a time he didn’t know Tess and it is killing him that he can’t do anything about the situation. So instead he talks to her. He talks to her and keeps talking because that is the only thing he can do to help and the first time she was hurt and had surgery they didn't talk for two months and he vowed to never have that happen again.

 

* * *

 

_It’s 2008, two years until the Olympics, and Tessa and Scott haven’t spoken a word to each other in two months. This is the longest they haven’t talked since they were kids, too afraid to talk to each other even though they were “dating” each other._   
_Scott feels miserable. He has been skating alone for the first time since he was nine and it feels very foreign. At practice he keeps turning to Tessa to tell her a joke, but she’s not there and he’s left to think about what went wrong._

_Two months ago, Tessa finally admitted to him that it wasn’t shin splints that was causing her pain and the pain was so much worse than she had previously been telling him. Apparently, it has been happening for a lot longer than she told him and that only two minutes into their programs she felt excruciating pain in her shins._

_It was after practice when she spoke to him about it. She would be going home to have surgery for what the doctor diagnosed as compartment syndrome and would not be able to skate for at least a few months. He tried to be supportive at first when she was explaining to him that it was either the surgery or risk not ever skating again. And then they fought because Scott wasn’t ever good at containing his anger, even with Tess, and then he felt bad and quickly apologizing and was pleading with her to forgive him. And of course she did because they are Tessa and Scott. Except then, as he was dropping her off at her house after practice, he did something stupid. Incredibly stupid. And that is why he hasn’t been able to call her, well part of the reason._

_As he pulled into her driveway and put the car in park, he leaned over to Tessa and gave her a tight hug. She said he would miss him and then he kissed her. Because God knows he has been doing a horrible job of controlling himself around her lately. And she kissed him back. Their lips moving together in sync, just like their skating. Her hands moved to his hair as he deepened the kiss and against her lips he whispered, “God I love you Tess.” And she quickly pulled away, tucking her hair behind her ear and biting her lip. “I should get going. See you later Scott.” And those were the last words they have spoken to each other as she stepped out of the car and out of his life._

_But, even worse than the kiss, he’s scared that they won’t skate together again. He knows that Tessa has been doing okay, from updates from his mother and Marina, but the thought of her maybe not being able to skate haunts him enough to keep him awake at night._

_Right now he is skating by himself because he refuses to let Marina partner him with someone else. He can’t even think about skating with someone other than Tess, let alone practice with them, so he continues to refuse her advisement._

_He knows that he should just call Tessa and tell her his fears so they can communicate like they have spent so much time working on, but he can’t seem to do it. She hasn’t made the effort to call him either so why should he?_

_He gets in a fight with his mom about this because he is home for the weekend._

_“Scotty, you’re telling me you still haven’t even talked to Tessa since her surgery?” Scott's mom scolds him. She’s looking at him not angry, but more disappointed which is almost worse than if she was yelling at him._

_“No,” Scott says a little too loudly. “And might I add that she hasn’t made the effort to even text me let alone call me about how she’s doing.”_

_“Scott, honey. Tessa is very vulnerable right now. She just had surgery and she’s probably just as scared as you, probably more. So it’s your job as a good partner to be there for her.” Alma tries to explain to her son._

_“Fine I’ll text her.” Scott replies flatly. “But I can’t promise anything.”_

_Scott sends Tessa a text after ten minutes of typing and then deleting. He finally settled on a text that read something along the lines of, “Hey Tess! I just wanted to see how you were feeling. I’m back home for the weekend and was wondering if you wanted to get together!”_

_She replies back almost immediately, “It’s so good to hear from you Scott! How does right now sound? Meet me at my house in 20?”_

_Scott smiles to himself and replies back a quick yes and kisses his mom on the way out of the door. He gets into his car and starts on the familiar road to Tessa’s house._

_When he arrives at her house he barely steps onto the porch before he sees the door fly open and Tessa is flinging herself into his arms. He readily accepts her embrace and he buries his head into her familiar strawberry scented hair. They stay hugging like that for at least five minutes._

_“I’ve missed you so much. You have no idea.” Tessa says into his shoulder._

_“Oh, I have a pretty good idea if it’s as much as I missed you.” Scott replies, pulling her even tighter against his body._

_They aren’t perfect and they have a lot to talk about, but right now it feels pretty damn good to finally be hugging his best friend again and he never wants to let go._

 

* * *

 

Scott lifts his head from where it lays next to Tessa and gets up off of the bed when he notices that Marie, Kate and Jordan have made their way back to the room after giving Scott some time with Tessa. His head aches and it feels like a thousand elephants are stepping on his head. He closes his eyes and presses his fingers to his temples before taking a swig is water.

Marie informs him that she needs to get back home so Scott gets up to walk her out.

The doctor still hasn’t come back to Tessa’s room to update them so he decides to use the bathroom and get a snack from the cafeteria (even though he can’t even think about eating but Kate insists that he needs to eat). It’s been two days since Tess was in the accident and two and a half days since he has had a decent meal and cleaned himself up, so he doesn’t argue with Kate.

As he walks into the bathroom he takes a look in the mirror.

He looks at himself for the first time since Tessa’s accident. He looks like shit. His long hair is very greasy, he hasn’t shaved so he just has the faint outline of a mustache, and the bags under his eyes make him look ten years older.

Scott turns on the faucet and splashes water onto his face. He then uses his hands to try and smooth down his hair. After he has cleaned himself up he uses the bathroom quickly and washes his hands.

He walks out of the bathroom and heads down to the cafeteria and peers at the menu. His stomach is still in knots and he can’t even think about eating anything, but he settles on a small chocolate chip muffin to please Kate.

He sits down at a table alone and forces down the muffin. After he manages to finish it he closes his eyes and puts his head in his hands.

Why, why is this happening, Scott thinks. Why Tessa and not me.

Scott can’t fathom even the idea of losing her, something he has said too many times these past two days. He knows the doctor said it could be a couple days or a couple weeks until she wakes up, if she wakes up, but it feels like an eternity.

Why couldn’t he just have told Tessa how he felt sooner? Why were they doing that to themselves? They could have been so happy for far longer. And now? Scott’s not even sure if she will wake up.

He feels his stomach turn and the muffin he just shoved down is threatening to come up. He pushes his thoughts away to try and not throw up and rises from the chair to head out of the cafeteria.

He makes his way through the hospital back up to Tessa’s room. As he is walking back through Tessa’s door he hears the doctor talking to Kate and he utters three words that make Scott freeze.

“Tessa is pregnant.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember that small detail that Tessa mentioned in chapter one? Well here it is...


	4. I'd Take It All Back Just to Have You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for that cliffhanger last chapter. But, hope you're enjoying this roller coaster of emotions.

  
“What.” Scott says stunned and the doctor and Kate as well as Jordan turn their attention towards Scott, both looking equally as stunned.

“Tessa is pregnant?” Scott adds softly, repeating the doctors words.

“Please Scott, come in and join us and then I can explain.” The doctor responds. Scott does as he is told and walks into the room, proceeding to sit in a chair next to Jordan, who reaches over and grabs his hand, which Scott gratefully accepts.

“So, as I was telling Kate and Jordan before you came in, Tessa is now stable, but she is in fact pregnant. It is protocol for the ER doctors to give women a pregnancy test when they come in to the ER and we just received the blood test back from the lab that confirms that Tessa is pregnant.”

“This… this is a lot to process right now.” Kate manages to get out, her face ghost white.

“I know this is hard to hear, but it still has only been a few days since she has had surgery and that is completely normal for a patient to not be awake yet.” The doctor explains.

“Scott,” Kate says turning towards him. “Do you.. do you know who the father is?”

“Mom.” Jordan whispers.

“Do you even have to ask?” Scott questions. “Of course it’s me Kate, everyone has known about this for awhile.” And then he freezes, finally realizing what this means.

“Oh my God.” He says after a moment of silence. “We were supposed to be parents and now what? I do this alone, how does this even work since she’s not awake?” His words coming out a little choppy, while tears threaten to fall.

“It’s okay, just calm down Scott. Like I said it’s still normal for a patient who had the surgery Tessa had to not be awake yet, so there’s no need worry about that just yet. The baby will still be able to grow normally for now, but if and I say if Tessa is still not awake in the next week and a half or so there will be other options we will need to discuss.” Doctor Stevens says slowly to Scott. Jordan squeezes Scott’s hand to see if he is alright and Scott turns to Jordan and squeezes her hand back. Scott doesn’t say anything else and instead he sits in silence with a blank look on his face and lets Kate do the rest of the talking.

“Wha… what do we do now?” Kate asks, her voice shaking similar to Scott’s.

“Well, for now we will continue to monitor her here at the hospital and you guys just continue to sit with her and talk to her. I’ll be around if you have any other questions and if I can help guide you to some resources to help you all deal with this.” The doctor replies back. Kate and Jordan nod and the doctor walks out of the room. Scott sits in the same position and still doesn’t say a word.

After a while, Kate tells Jordan and Scott that she is going to go make a few calls. Scott looks up and sees her eyes are red and puffy, probably similar to what his own look like. After making brief eye contact with Scott, she heads out to the hallway to call Tessa’s brothers and her father, he assumes.

When she leaves Scott turns to Jordan.

“I… don’t know… what to do anymore.” Scott says weakly.

“Me too.” Jordan says after a moment of silence. They embrace each other and they both let the tears fall.

After about 20 minutes of holding each other and crying, they break apart and look at each other before breaking out into a laughing fit. Nothing is actually funny, the grief has just made their emotions all over the place and they can’t stop themselves from laughing.

“Scott Patrick Moir!” A voice says at the door of the room and that causes both Scott and Jordan to seize their laughing fit and turn their heads towards the door. It’s Kate.

“Please tell me why on earth you haven’t called your mother.” Kate says seriously. “She said that you texted her the other day and told her that Tessa was in an accident and had to go to the hospital, but that she was fine. She had no idea what was really going or how serious it was until I called her just now.”

“Um…” Scott mumbles before getting up from the chair. He begins to pace around the small hospital room. “I just didn’t know how to tell her. I mean you heard me on the phone when I called you. How am I supposed to tell her this? And you know she’d come rushing here and that’s the last thing I want.”

“Well she’s already on her way to the airport and is getting on the first flight here.” Kate tells him.

“Scott, it’s okay to need your mom. And I think it will be good to have her here. Maybe you can go home, get some new clothes, clean up a little.”

“I can’t leave Tessa. Why don’t you guys understand that!” Scott says a little louder than he meant to before he sits back down and lays his head on the bed next to Tessa, not saying another word.

“Okay. Okay” Kate says while pressing her fingers to her temples. “Well I can’t stay here just worrying and being stuck in this small room, so I’m going to go back to Tessa’s apartment for the night and get some rest and process all of this.” She says motioning with her hands. “Jordan you can join me if you’d like.”

“Okay, I can drive you.” She says to her mother. “Scott are you sure you don’t want to join us?”

“I’m sure.” He says quickly. “Here’s a key.” He says handing his key to Tessa’s apartment to Jordan.

Jordan and Kate leave, leaving Scott alone again with his thoughts.

_So Tessa really is pregnant,_ he thinks.

This is supposed to be something happy, something to celebrate, something to celebrate together. But instead it’s just causing him more pain. Because even if the baby does survive, what if Tessa doesn’t? How is he supposed to take care of a baby all by himself. He has nieces and nephews, but that’s not exactly the same. And sure he loves kids and has always wanted them, but he has wanted them with Tessa and if she’s not here with him he doesn’t know how he’ll be able to live with that.

Will he resent the child because he or she is not Tessa? He doesn’t want to feel that way, but what if he can’t help it?

Scott is tired of all the what if’s and just hopes that Tess will wake up because he doesn’t think his heart can handle any more heartbreak.

* * *

He doesn’t remember falling asleep, but he awakens to the sound of his mother’s voice and the sunlight streaming through the cheap curtains in the hospital room. His back aches from too many nights of sleeping on a chair, so he lifts his head so he can slowly sit up.

“Hi Scotty.” His mother says softly.

“Mom.” Scott says and can’t help the small smile that curves his lips. “I’m so glad you’re here.” He says as she embraces him and they both let the tears fall that have been falling infinitely these past few days.

“Of course honey. Why didn’t you call sooner? It’s Tess, I should have been here for her and for you.” Alma says softly.

“I know, I know mom I messed up.” Scott replies. “I just didn’t know how to tell you. I mean I barely was able to tell Marie and Kate where I was at. How was I supposed to call you and tell you Tessa is hurt and it’s all my fault.”

“Scott, honey, of course it’s not your fault. please stop blaming yourself. I hate to see you hurting already for Tessa and you do not need to add blame that is definitely not warranted.” Alma tries to convince Scott.

A few days later Alma finally convinces Scott to go back to his apartment to get some fresh clothes and clean up a bit and maybe try and not think about the whole Tessa is in the hospital and might not wake up situation.

Except, when he gets to his apartment everything reminds him of Tessa. A hair tie in the bathroom, her book on the bedside table, a stray sock she left on the floor, the list goes on. It’s even worse when he lays down on his bed and her scent is still on his bed sheets. He takes in her scent and becomes angry. He has only been sad for the most part up until now, but right now he is angry. Angry at God, angry at the world, angry with himself, and angry with that dumb ass who hit Tessa.

He gets up from the bed, deciding he doesn’t need rest or rather won’t get any with Tessa on his mind.

He makes his way to the kitchen and opens the fridge. There is nothing in there besides food that is mostly expired by now and a case of beer. He digs around the food and takes a bottle of beer out the case and starts to close the fridge, but before he does, he decides to open it back up and rather take the whole case of beer.

He walks out of the kitchen and sits down on the couch in the living room, the case of beer in hand. He settles down on the couch and tilts his head back as he takes a long swig if his beer.

He drinks. And drinks. And drinks, until his pain is only a blurry memory.

* * *

It’s been a week since Scott has seen Tessa. After his mom made him leave the hospital he couldn’t bring himself to go back. Also he’s not sure if he could even make it because ever since he sat down and took that first drink he hasn’t stopped. He’s basically been drunk for a week and it’s getting harder to come up with excuses for why no one has seen him in a week.

Alma, Kate, and Jordan have all come over and he has been able to fake being sober, even though he’s pretty sure they can all see right through him, I mean they’ve all been through that post Sochi Scott era. But, nevertheless they have left him alone to deal with whatever the hell is even going on with Tessa at this point. They have made sure to bring him food and text him updates on Tessa and he knows his mom comes here at night when she thinks he’s sleeping to check up on him and clean up a bit, but they all have realized nothing they say or do will change how he’s feeling. The only thing that can change it is if Tessa wakes up and right now Scott’s not so sure that’s going to happen. He’s lost all hope and even the drinking is not stopping that. And to top that off he’s going to be a father, well supposed to be a father, he’s lost a lot of hope in this situation as well.

So now he’s sitting on his couch in his apartment, trash and beer cans surrounding him while he’s wearing a week old shirt that reeks of sweet and beer. His head feels fuzzy and he hasn’t gotten a full nights sleep in days. He really should stop drinking and get his act together, but he can’t. He knows he’s pathetic. If Tessa could see him now. Hell if anyone could see him now. “Scott Moir, three time Olympic medalist wasted out of his goddamn mind once again.”

Scott looks around his apartment and shakes his head. God, he has to stop being sorry for himself and get it together. He should be there for his mom, Tessa’s mom, and Jordan. Except he can’t just shake this off. It’s Tessa. Tessa his skating partner. His best friend. The love of his life. And now apparently the mother of his child.

“I can’t do this anymore.” Scott yells to no one as his voice echoes off the walls and his words come out a little slurred.

He gets up, goes to his room to get a change of clothes for the first time in a week, throws a hat on top of his grown out mess of hair and walks out the door.

Stumbling through the streets, still obviously drunk, he eventually makes it to Gadbois, the only  
place that could even possibly begin to fix him. If that’s even possible at this point. When he makes his way up to the door, he hesitates before opening the door to the rink. This place reminds him of Tessa the most. It’s where they found their love for skating again and for each other. It’s where they trained so hard for the Olympics and made their dream possible once again. He almost can’t go in here without Tess, but instead to buries his thoughts and pushes open the door.

The cool air from the rink blasts against his skin, contrast to the warm summer air outside.

Scott sits down on one of the benches and laces up his skates. He sees Patch out of the corner of his eye as he makes his way over to him.

“Scott.” Patch says and Scott can see the sadness in his eyes.

“Hey.” Is all Scott responds back.

“Are you alright? How are you doing?” Patch asks, but Scott cringes at the question because that’s all alone anyone been asking for the last week and of course he’s not alright, far from it. But it’s Patch and he’s just looking out for him so Scott tries not to look and sound too pissed off.

“Um I’m fine. You know, pushing through it.”

“Are you sure this is a good idea Scott? To skate?” He adds. Clearly smelling the beer on his breath.

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine I told you.” Scott replies back a little too harshly.

“Okay.” Patch says. “Just be careful. Alright? And lock up when you’re done.”

“Of course.” Scott responds and with that he heads for the ice.

He tries to forget that Tessa isn’t here skating with him, but it’s useless because she’s not here and he’s dancing on his own for the first time since her first surgery. And it sucks. And he’s still drunk so he keeps falling all over the ice.

Twenty minutes later and about fifty falls later, Scott attempts a single axle because he’s an ice dancer and never gets to do them and in his current state of mind he thinks that he can do anything and as he’s mid air about to go down for the landing his head begins to feel fuzzy and the next thing he’s on the ice laughing hysterically and in a little pain. And then he’s crying, but not from the pain of the fall, but rather the pain from what his life has turned into. He hasn’t cried since the hospital a week ago, given he has been too drunk to think straight, and now all the tears just begin to fall.

He doesn’t know how long it’s been, but as he’s sitting on the ice with his arms wrapped around his legs and his head tucked between his knees, Alma approaches him and engulfs him in a hug.

“I knew I’d find you here.” Alma says comforting him before she unleashes her wrath. After he has stopped crying is when she begins to scold him.

“Now stand up.” She orders him. “Now!” Scott is taken aback by the harshness of her voice and his lip quivers and he feels incredible vulnerably right now.

“Scott.” Alma says more calmly now, noticing the reaction from her son. “I know you’re hurting right now and I can’t begin to imagine the pain you’re feeling, but it’s no use to be drunk out of your mind every single day. I have left you alone for the past week hoping you would work through it yourself and come to me when you needed me, but that clearly is not working. So you need to get up, clean yourself up, and please for God's sake stop the drinking. Tessa wouldn’t want you to do this to yourself because look at you, it’s Sochi all over again and she would definitely not want you to act like that again.”

He looks up at his mom and looks her in the eyes. Oh Scott remembers that time all too well.

* * *

_The Olympics are over. Tessa and Scott didn’t win gold, but instead earned the silver medal. And they’re happy with it, he’s happy with it. They performed well and felt good about the games, but they wanted to bring home the gold for Canada and themselves but it’s easier to tell the rest of the world it doesn’t hurt as bad as it really does._

_But they have still achieved their dreams. They won gold in Vancouver which was a dream come true in itself and then they were able to make another Olympics and win silver in Sochi, more medals than the most people have in a lifetime, so it’s fine with Scott._

_Except now, they have decided that this was their last Olympics and Scott has found himself running from the sport or well running from his life in general._

_It hasn’t exactly been a smooth ride and they figured that they got everything they dreamed of since they were kids. Except they really didn’t because ever since Scott was a kid he has loved Tessa and he can’t exactly do that if they only see each other every couple weeks or when they are obligated to for shows._

_Ever since Scott kissed Tessa before her surgery things haven’t exactly been as easy as before. He found it harder to control himself around her and he did and still does have a girlfriend, so there’s that. Despite that, they have been able to mend their broken friendship and were able to communicate all through the past two Olympics._

_But now, without the sport they haven’t been talking, well they’ve been talking but only the basic small talk when they meet up for coffee every couple weeks. It’s just not the same._

_And now Scott doesn’t know what to do because Tessa is his best friend and he wants to be able to talk to her, hangout with her, but most importantly tell her how he really feels. But he can’t. He has a girlfriend and Kaitlyn great. She really is. And he loves her and he could really see them building a life together. But the thing is, and he hates himself for even thinking this, but she’s not Tessa. He knows he can just tell Tessa this, except he doesn’t want to ruin their already crumbling friendship and if it doesn’t work out he couldn’t imagine losing Tessa. He’d rather have Tessa as his best friend than not have Tessa at all. Which is kind of a stupid thing to say because he barely even has Tessa right now as a friend. She’s busy and he’s well he’s busy too. Living his 18 year old life in his 20s he supposes. They missed out on a lot while training so hard for the Olympics so Scott deserves to have a little fun, at least that’s what he tells himself._

_So tonight he finds himself in another bar, this time not alone like he usually is. It’s not a good habit to take up, but it’s easier to be drunk right now than it is to not be._

_He has been able to sort of keep it away from his family, but he’s sure they know because this is a small town after all. He’s pretty sure Tessa doesn’t know, but maybe she doesn’t even care. After all, they haven’t had a meaningful conversation in months._

_But instead of drinking by himself, tonight he is with a group of his old friends that invited him to a local bar for a get together._

_He still hasn’t recovered from the night before, so he arrives to the bar still drunk from last nights alcohol._

_He enjoys himself and it’s the first time since the Olympics perhaps. And of course he has a little too much to drink._

_As he’s talking to his friend Ashley one of his buddies come over to him and puts his hands on Scott’s shoulder._

_“Hey man, you should’ve brought Tessa.” His words coming out a bit slurred from all the alcohol. “You need to introduce me. I would hit that so hard.”_

_“What the fuck dude.” Scott yells drunkenly. He throws a punch at the guy and hits him in the jaw._

_“It was just a fucking joke Scott, what’s up with you?” The guy barely gets out before he sees Scott’s fist coming towards his face again. As he sees the punch coming he grabs Scott’s fist and throws a punch of his own close to Scott’s mouth. Ashley steps back and goes to get her husband for help to break up the fight._

_Blood shoots out from Scott’s mouth and he spits it out. He is still pretty fit from the Olympics, despite not working out and drinking every night. So he tackles his buddy to the floor and they both begin punching at each other._

_A moment later Ashley’s husband comes over and breaks up the fight. Both men back down reluctantly and look around embarrassed as the whole bar is looking at them._

_Scott heads for the door and walks into the cool fall air. Ashley follows him out. She is pregnant so she hasn’t been drinking and is able to calmly calm down Scott._

_After Scott seems to be okay, other than the fact that he is incredibly drunk, Ashley calls the only person that knows Scott the best. When she takes out her phone Scott knows exactly what she’s doing._

_“Please don’t call her.” He begs. “I don’t want her to see me like this.” But she ignores him and clicks on the contact in her phone._

_“Hey Tessa.” Ashley says into the phone. “This is Scott’s friend from Ilderton, Ashley.”_

_“Oh Ashley,” Scott hears Tessa say on the other line. “It’s nice to hear from you, but is something wrong?”_

_“Sorry I know it’s late,” Ashley starts to say. “But I’m here with Scott and he got in a fight at the bar and I didn’t know who else to call because I don’t think his mom should see him like this.”_

_“Yeah that wouldn’t be a good idea. Thanks for calling me. Can you text me the address and I can be there in 20.” Tessa replies._

_“Okay, see you soon.” Ashley replies before hanging up the phone._

_Scott sits pouting while Ashley tries to clean some of the blood off of his face._

_Scott sees Tessa’s car pull into the parking lot exactly 20 minutes later. He sees her shiver as she steps out into the cool wind. He doesn’t take his eyes off of her as she walks over to them and gives Ashley a hug. They talk for a few minutes and Scott can’t quite make out what they are saying, but he assumes it’s about him because Tessa keeps looking over in his direction._

_As she finally walks over to him, they make eye contact and her eyes look sad and not the same happy they usually look when she looks at him._

_“Come on Scott, get up.” Tessa says to him._

_“No.” He says back, almost childlike given his drunk state._

_“I’m not going to argue with you right now Scott, especially about this because this is for your own good. If you don’t want to come with me then Ashley will just drop you off at your parents house and your mom will see you like this.” Before Tessa’s even done speaking he gets up because he definitely does not want his mom to see him like this, he has already put her through enough for one lifetime and he doesn’t need to add cleaning up his drunk self to the list._

_They don’t talk during the drive and Scott can tell that Tessa is angry. Another perk (or curse Scott’s not sure) of knowing Tessa for almost his whole life, being able to tell what she’s feeling without her actually saying anything._

_Scott leans his head against the inside of the car door and closes his eyes. He doesn’t open them until he feels the car come to a stop and realizes that Tessa has taken him to her house in London._

_She gets out of the car and helps him out as well, but he refuses her help even though he is stumbling all over the place. She throws up her hands and groans._

_She unlocks to door and leads him up the stairs to the bathroom. She turns on the shower and then turns to face him._

_“I hope you’re sober enough to shower.” She says before leaving the bathroom and shutting the door._

_Scott shakes his head angrily and hops into the shower. When he’s done he takes a towel from the rack and wraps it around his waist before opening the door._

_Tessa is sitting on her bed waiting for him. She throws an old pair of sweatpants and leafs shirt, that she must have stole from him, right at his face. He reaches up his hands to catch them, but his reaction time is slow from all the alcohol he’s had, and they fall to the floor._

_“If your gonna just be angry with me the whole time why did you even come and get me then?” He yells to Tessa._

_“Because Scott…” she starts to say. “Even when you’re drunk and you’re being a jerk I’ll always be there for you no matter what.”_

_“Yeah sure.” Is all he says back._

_“What’s that’s supposed to mean?” She says loudly._

_“God Tess. Really? Where have you been for all these months then? Not with me that’s for sure.” Scott spits back._

_“That’s low Scott. You know I’ve been busy doing work stuff. And what have you been doing? Drinking your liver away?” Tessa yells back._

_“You… you know? About my drinking I mean?”_

_“Well look at you? Of course I do. And your mothers been talking to me because of course I care about you even when we aren’t always in the best place.” Now Scott feels bad. Of course she knew. It’s Tessa. Even when he tries to make her into the enemy, she’s not._

_“I’m… I’m sorry Tess. It’s just it’s hard and…” he gets out before the tears fall and later he’ll blame it on being drunk, but really he has wanted to cry every day since him and Tessa stopped seeing each other all the time._

_“Scott come here.” Tessa says while pulling him onto her bed before he lays his head on her chest._

_“It’s just we haven’t been talking, not really, and I miss you and I miss skating and I thought the drinking would make those feelings go away but it doesn’t and I just miss you.” Scott says quietly._

_“I miss you too. And I promise that after tonight we will work on our communicating again and you’ll stop drinking and everything will be fine because we’ll have each other.” She says while comforting him._

_“We’ll have each other.” Scott repeats back before he falls asleep in her arms._

* * *

“Scott.” His mom says taking him out of his daze. “Scott honey, let's get you sobered up and then get back to the hospital. The doctor needs to talk to you.”

Scott nods. Yes, he needs to go back to Tessa because he doesn’t want this to be like after Sochi because this time Tessa isn’t here to pick up the mess.

So he allows his mom to bring him back to his apartment and is stuck again hoping that Tessa will come back to him because God knows what he’d give up to have her back. But he also knows that he needs to be strong now, if not for Tessa, but for his baby. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	5. I Forget You're Not Here When I Close My Eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long for me to update. I've been very busy and I wanted to make sure this chapter wasn't rushed. Also notice that I changed the chapter count! That being said hope you enjoy!

Scott arrives back at the hospital after showering and changing out of his putrid smelling clothes, sober for the first time in a week. Thankfully his mom showed up to the rink when she did and got him out of his habits before it was too late to turn back.

Scott feels weird being back at the hospital because not having been here for a week has made it seem like he has dreamed up the whole thing. As much as he wishes that was the case, it is not and Tessa is still the same as she was when he left. Well theoretically the same but on the inside who knows what damage has been done from the coma.

Scott feels anxious as he walks into Tessa’s room because he feels like Tessa senses that he hasn’t been here and he feels horrible about it. He’s also anxious because his mom says the doctor needs to talk to him and that can’t be a good sign.

When Kate and Jordan notice that Scott and Alma have appeared through the doorway, they both stand up to greet them.

“Thank God you’re alright Scott, I was getting worried.” Kate utters while hugging him. After she releases him from a tight hug, Jordan moves to stand in front of Scott and wears a neutral expression while shaking her head, but ends up pulling him into a tight embrace.

“You better not do that again, for Tessa’s sake.” Jordan whispers into his ear.

“Never.” Scott whispers back.

“I’m glad you’re back, Tess needs you, the baby needs you.” Jordan adds quietly.

“I’m not going anywhere not anymore.” Scott replies back and then breaks the hug. They all take their respective seats and wait for the doctor to come with the update on Tessa.

Scott takes deep breaths and tries to focus on his new goal, being present and supporting Tessa and the baby, instead of continuing on the path of self pity. It’s hard not to think about the inevitable and all of the what ifs, but he’s determined to change his mindset. PMA. Positive Mental Attitude. Even if it means shoving down all of his fears, having a positive mindset will have to do.

After a grueling thirty minutes of sitting in silence, Doctor Stevens finally arrives to give them an update.   
The doctor smiles when he sees that Scott has returned, however it is more of a sad smile, and Scott tries to ignore the pit in his stomach. PMA. PMA. he repeats over and over in his head.

“It’s good to see you all here together.” Doctor Steven says. “I have an update on Tessa.” Scott gulps as the pit in his stomach rises to his throat, anticipating the bad news.

“There hasn’t been any changes in Tessa’s condition and the baby is looking very healthy, but….” Here it is, Scott thinks, the big but.

“Tessa has been here for almost two weeks in a coma like state. There are some decisions to be made or things that we need to at least start talking about. One of them is if you would like to move Tessa to a long term care facility in which the staff is used to these types of conditions and can accommodate for her. There are also decisions that need to be made about the baby. If Tessa doesn’t wake up, would you continue with the pregnancy or would termination be the route to go. We need to come up with a timeline for how long you would like the doctors to continue helping her breathe, eat, ect. Or if a long term facility is the better option.” The room is silent as Doctor Stevens finishes up the update, only the faint hum of the air conditioner fills the room.

“I know this is a lot to take in so I’m going to leave you guys to discuss this as a family and let me know if you have any questions or are interested in the resources I mentioned last week about helping to deal with this.” And with that, the doctor leaves the room and leaves the Virtues and Moirs staring at their feet in silence. Alma is the first to speak.

“Wow.” she utters.

“I don’t even… what are we going to do.” Kate stutters and Alma reaches over her chair to embrace Kate.

“This fucking sucks. It fucking sucks.” Jordan says, while tears roll down her face.

“Fuck having a positive attitude.” Scott says, almost mimicking Jordans response.

“Language.” Both their mothers say out of habit, despite how ironic it is to be correcting their children's language while the situation they’re in is far worse than a few swear words.

Scott puts his head into his hands and lets out an angry groan. He tried having a positive attitude, but fuck, how is he supposed to be positive about this. By the way the doctor was talking Tessa should have been awake by now and because she isn’t she might never be. And sure his child is literally growing inside of her right now, but is that even right if she’s not even doing normal functions on her own. His tears begin to fall again, hot against his cheeks, throwing his positive attitude out the window.

After what seems like a lifetime, Kate and Alma get up to go take a walk outside and talk about this fucked up thing they are dealing with right now because they all know it would be a terrible idea to talk about this in front of Scott. It’s now just Jordan and Scott (and obviously Tessa) in the room. Jordan opens her mouth to speak, but Scott stops her.

“Can we not talk about his right now.” Scott says while motioning his hands. “I need some time to process.” Scott says quietly.

“Of course.” Jordan says. “What do you want to talk about then.”

“I don’t know. Just not about the decisions we have to make.” Scott replies.

“Okay. So we haven’t really talked since we found out the news, but I’m guessing you didn’t know Tessa was pregnant.” Jordan questions.

“I thought I said I didn’t want to talk about it.” Scott says while rolling his eyes.

“Well…” Jordan starts. “Technically you said not to talk about any decisions and I’m not.” Jordan says playfully.

“Fine.” Scott says seriously. “I didn’t know. Did you?” He asks while raising his eyebrows.

“Yes and no. She didn’t exactly say it, but it was sort of implied.” Jordan explains. “She called me a few days before the accident asking me if I thought she would be a good mom and all that so I sort of assumed.”

“Oh.” Is all Scott says. “Do… do you think she was going to tell me about it the night of the accident?”

“I don’t know Scott. And I thought we weren’t talking about that.”

“We’re not.”

“Okay, then why don’t you tell me when you two first got together. There’s bets riding on this. Like huge bets.” Jordan says while laughing, trying to make light of the situation.

And Scott laughs too because even though he’s hurting right now, he doesn’t doubt the extreme amounts of money that has been bet by their families after twenty one years. And so he tells her about all of their repressed feelings (that she probably already knew about because who didn’t at this point) and the night that everything changed, sparing most of the more intimate details. At this point even talking to Jordan about their relationship is better than sitting around and doing nothing, so Scott is grateful for the distraction and reminisces back to easier times.

* * *

_Scott can’t believe it. Him and Tessa are now two time Olympic gold medalists. I mean he’s not exactly surprised. Not in the cocky way like he was during Vancouver, but because they have worked so hard and came up with an incredible come back plan. And this time around it’s not like they would be exactly disappointed with not winning gold because it was mostly about the process for them, but it still feels pretty damn good to win it all._

_Scott should be celebrating. He is celebrating. Well at least trying to celebrate. Now, fresh off the skate of their life, Tessa and Scott are at Canada House with the rest of team Canada. It’s not like he’s not having fun catching up and having a good time with all the other Olympians. It’s just the thing is, Scott can’t stop looking at Tessa._

_She’s mesmerizing. It’s not like she’s even doing anything out of the ordinary and that’s what Scott loves the most. She’s dressed in the same Canada gear he is, but she looks just as beautiful as she would in the most elegant dress in the world. He watches her as she sways with the music, occasionally turning towards her friends and giggling._

_He knows he should be socializing more, maybe have a few more drinks, but whatever he does his attention always goes back to Tess._

_It’s funny because the past Olympics the best part was the partying, the drinking, the sex, and whatever else may or may not have happened. But now, the best part wasn’t about what came after it was about what came during. Like the way he felt when he heard the first beat of Moulin Rouge. Or the way he felt when he looked into Tessa’s eyes on the ice. And even the way he felt after their skate when he got to hug Tess and hear his favorite sound in the world, her laugh cry._

_Maybe it’s because he’s matured or maybe it’s because he’s just that hopelessly in love with his skating partner and that he can’t even go a night of celebrating without being around her._

_He could just go up to her and whisper in her ear to ask her to dance. He could there’s nothing stopping him, but should he?_

_Scott’s not exactly sure what they are right now. They have a well indefinable relationship as Tessa would put it. Sure they’re skating partners and best friends, but during the last few years something in their relationship has changed. Sure something has always been there, how could it not be when you work so close together for so long and their programs aren’t exactly platonic. But still they have never exactly crossed “that” boundary. Sure they have kissed as teenagers, but specifically in the last two years though, there has been an increasing amount of longing looks, hands held a little too long, and kisses meant for cheeks but seem to be scarcely close to lips. And on top of that they basically have spent all of their evenings together switching off between apartments when they see each other enough during the day. But, no they haven’t crossed that boundary of sex. No matter how bad either of them have wanted to at one point or another. Maybe he should just go up to her, maybe they could talk…_

_“Hey.” Tessa whispers into his ear in a raspy voice, interrupting his thoughts. He tries to hold back a shiver as her her lips graze his ear. He must have zoned out and didn’t even notice Tessa walk over to him. “I got you a drink. It looked like you needed one and it’s a party after all.”_

_“Right.” He says before taking a sip of his beer. “Thank you.”_

_God she’s even more beautiful up close and it takes all of his strength not to kiss her right then and there._

_“Want to dance?” She questions while reaching her hand out. Scott takes it._

_“You read my mind.”_

_“I guess that just happens after twenty years.” Tessa jokes._

_“Mmm hm.” Scott mumbles as she leads him out closer to the music._

_He brings her close and puts his free hand low on her waist as she leans into him. They mostly sway back and forth, enjoying each other’s company and carrying on a conversation every few minutes. After awhile Tessa rests her head on Scott’s shoulder and he tucks his head into her neck (which happens to be one of his favorite places) and breathes in the scent of her hair._

_“I can’t believe we actually did it. We actually did it.” Tessa whispers into his shoulder._

_“Me too.” Scott replies. “After it happened I was so excited and like I couldn’t even contain my energy, I mean you could probably tell.” And she laughs and nods into his shoulder. And he’s not sure if it’s because she’s in his arms right now or he’s still on a high from winning, but he ignores the warning bells in his head and tells her the truth. “But, right now I’m not even thinking about the Olympics. All I’m thinking about is you.”_

_Tessa looks up at him with her green eyes wide, but a second later the surprise in them is gone and they look soft and full of love. He looks down at her and they lock eyes. And the next thing he knows is one second they’re dancing and the next they’re standing outside of his hotel room while he’s fidgeting with the lock._

_Once he gets it open they walk into the middle of the room and are almost unsure of what to do next. But then they lock eyes again and the next thing his lips are on hers._

_The kiss starts slow and sweet, almost like his first kiss. He hasn’t kissed Tessa since that one night before her surgery as teenagers, but damn he didn’t remember it being this good._

_Not soon after the kiss intensifies and he feels her tongue against his lips asking for permission to enter. He gladly accepts and intensifies the kiss._

_“Bed.” Tessa says in between kisses. And Scott agrees as they move towards the bed. Tessa begins to unzip her jacket and unbutton her pants as he does the same._

_“Tess.” He says huskily against her lips. “Are you sure. I mean we just won the Olympics. Maybe we should wait.” He says, even if he wants nothing more than her right now and the bulge in his pants agrees._

_“Haven’t we waited long enough.” She replies and Scott nods his head in agreement before he goes back to kissing Tessa._

_After, when they are laying in bed, Scott’s arms firmly wrapped around Tessa as her head lies on his chest, he wants nothing more than to tell her that he loves her. Because he does, always has. And not in the platonic way. But in the way that he wants to come home to her everyday, cook her meals, have babies with her, grow old with her._

_“Tessa I…” but before he can tell her that he loves her, he chickens out because this is only the first time they have actually slept together and they haven’t even been on a date, even though in a normal relationship they would probably be considered married at this point. And maybe Tessa doesn’t even want him like that? Maybe she just wants sex? Oh god what is he going to do._

_“What?” Tessa asks, confused when he doesn’t continue._

_“Um.” Scott scrambles to try to come up with something to say. He looks down at the sheet over top of them and gets an idea._

_“What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed?”_

_“Um what?” Tessa says looking extremely confused._

_“Oh sheet.” Scott replies as Tessa lets out a giggle._

_“Scott Moir. We just had sex for the first time. Pretty good sex in fact and the first thing you say to me is a stupid joke.”_

_“Pretty good sex?” Scott questions. “I would say remarkably mind blowing sex.” Tessa bursts out laughing and whacks his arm before planting a soft kiss on his lips._

_And so their incredibly complicated relationship just became a lot more complicated._

* * *

“So the night after you guys won the Olympics? That’s the date.” Jordan asks, taking Scott out of his trance.

“Uh yeah. I mean that’s the night we first you know….”

“Damn it!” Jordan shouts. “I thought it was going to be way before that. You guys totally screwed me over.”

“Sorry?” Scott jokes. “Any ways I’m not talking any more about that with you, but yeah we have sort of been seeing each other, if you can call it that. And you already already know we haven’t exactly discussed everything and like I said before I was going to tell T and then this happened. So yeah.”

“Yeah, but not like you guys were really doing a good job of keeping it a secret” Jordan replies.

“No I guess not, eh.” Scott supplies.

“I’m gonna go down to the food court. You want anything?” Jordan asks.

“Nah, I’m good. I’ll stay here with Tess.”

“Okay, I’ll be back in a few.” Jordan replies and Scott nods before Jordan heads out the door.

“Oh Tess.” Scott says to Tessa while clasping her hand. “I wish I just told you how I felt that night then maybe none of this would have happened. This is just all too much and I’m so sorry I haven’t been here. It’s just too hard to see you like this and know I can’t do anything about it. I love you so much.” He says as a single tear rolls down his face. He closes his eyes as to wish this all away like maybe it will all disappear.

Suddenly he feels movement from the hand in his. She hasn’t moved her hand before. Could she… could she be waking up?

Scott slowly opens his eyes as if he’s scared any sudden movement will cause Tessa’s response to stop. He opens his eyes to see that nothing as changed. Maybe he imagined it?

Suddenly, Tessa’s eyes slowly flutter open and he is met with a sea of green.

“Tess.” He says softly so he doesn’t scare her, even if every fiber in his body wants to jump up and scream for joy.

“Sco… Scott.” She manages to say, her voice raspy. He picks up a glass of water and hands it to her so she can clear her throat.

“Oh my God Tessa. Thank god you’re alright.” Scott says a little louder now, with a huge smile growing on his face. “I… I can’t believe it.” Tears of joy now streaming down his face.

“Wha… what happened? Where am I?” Tessa manages to get out despite her extremely hoarse voice.

“You were in an accident. Oh my god Tess I was so scared. I thought… I thought you weren’t going to make it and that I would have to raise our baby by myself and I didn’t know how I could live like that and…” Scott continues to ramble on and it’s a little too much for Tessa to handle because she is having a hard time keeping up, so she stops him.

“You know about the baby?” Tessa says a little fearful, not sure about how he was going to react when she was going to tell him that night that she guesses was when the accident was. “And it’s going to be okay, even with the accident?”

“Yes the the doctor told me and yes he or she is very healthy. Speaking of the doctor I should probably let him know you’re awake. But before I do I need to tell you something.” He says before taking a deep breathe. “I know this probably all seems really confusing right now because you probably don’t know what’s going on, but I just wanted to tell you that I love you like want to spend the rest of my life with you love you and I should have told you sooner I know, but I’m saying it now because it seems like I’ve been given a second chance at this and I’m not going to waste it.”

“Scott. Scott.” Tessa says with tears in her eyes. “I love you too.” Scott can’t help the hug grin that spreads across his face and he sees Tessa looks the same. He bends down to give her a quick kiss and they both smile into the kiss.

“I’m going to get the doctor. I’ll be right back I promise. Then we can talk more.” Scott says to her, still smiling.

He heads towards the door, but before he steps out of the room, Tessa calls his name.

“Scott.” She says and he turns around. “What’s going on? Why am I in the hospital?”

Scott’s heart drops to his stomach and he tries to not overreact.

“Scott.” Tessa pleads. “Why am I in the hospital?” She repeats, but Scott leaves her with a confused look on her face while he is frozen in the doorway. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pretty sure this is not what you all meant when you said you wanted Tessa to wake up... sorry!


	6. I Want To Tell You Everything I Never Got To Say

“Antero... what now?” Scott says to Doctor Stevens as he is trying to explain the situation to the Virtues and Moirs in the hallway.

“Anterograde amnesia.” Doctor Stevens repeats. “Basically...” He says turning towards the rest of the family, “Tessa has lost her short term memory. Although the surgery did go without complications there was some bleeding that could have happened where her short term memory is stored in the brain. However, since Tessa was involved in a crash, the memory loss could also be due to the extreme trauma to her brain. Usually this is short term, but again there aren’t always for sures in medicine.”

“But the good thing is Tess is awake now.” Alma says to try and lighten the mood.

“Yes, it is a fantastic thing that Tessa is awake now.” The doctor says smiling. “Right now, given the circumstances, it would be a good idea for you all to continue talking to Tessa. Maybe not about the accident, but keep it light and work in a few questions here and there to try and stimulate her brain so she can maybe start to remember. Meanwhile, I’ll get a specialist down here to talk to Tessa and assess her to see what we are dealing with.”

The doctor walks away and leaves the Virtues and Moirs in silence. Scott’s head is spinning and he can barely stand up. He almost feels like he did when he first found out about Tessa’s accident. _Almost_. At least Tessa is awake now. That’s all that should matter. That Tessa is alright, awake and talking. Except she isn’t alright. She can’t make new memories and if she can’t make new memories she won’t ever remember him telling her he loves her. His face falls at this thought. But, at least she’s awake he reminds himself.

“Scott. Earth to Scott.” Jordan says while shaking his shoulders, taking him out of his thoughts.

“I’m sorry.” Scott says turning towards her. “What did you say?”

“I asked you if you wanted to go in and talk to Tess.” Jordan repeats. Scott opens his mouth but nothing comes out. He’s conflicted. Of course he really wants to see Tessa and talk to her now that’s she’s awake, but this isn’t the Tessa he wants to talk to. He wants to talk to the Tessa that will remember him promising to love her and their baby forever. Not the Tessa that will forget that every ten minutes.

“You and Kate can go in first.”

“Are you sure?” Jordan questions.

“Yeah, I need time and it’s not like she’s going anywhere anytime soon.” He tells her with a forced laugh. Jordan gives him a confused look, but he just nods his head telling her to go.

He needs time. Time to process. Time to think. And to be honest he doesn’t even know what he would say to her right now. Does he act like everything is normal and he doesn’t know about the baby? Or does he continue to tell her that he loves her and hope that one time she remembers?

She obviously knows he _loves_ her, but he hasn’t actually said it to her in the way he wants to when she can remember because they were just too dumb (or scared, yeah definitely scared) to talk about it before because of what it would mean. They both knew that this would be it for them if they really decided to be together and I guess the thought just scared them a little. But now? Now Scott isn't sure of much, but he is sure that he’s not scared to tell her how he feels because if the last few weeks have taught him anything it’s that he is way more scared of losing her than telling her he loves her.

However, he is afraid that if he goes in there, he’s just going to blurt out how much he loves her and the baby and then ten minutes later, poof. Everything he’s said is forgotten.

So yes, he doesn’t know what to even say to her because what he wants to say will only make him feel worse. And he’s trying to feel better because Tess is awake and that’s what’s important right?

“Scott.” Alma says quietly beside him. He totally forgot she was there and she is probably worried by his silence. “Scotty you alright?”

“Yeah. Yeah I’m fine. Just thinking.” He replies back.

“Do you want to talk about it? I know it’s a little hard to swallow all of this.” Alma gestures with her hands. Scott shakes his head.

“I don’t know. Not really.” Scott says quietly.

“Okay.” Alma says while wrapping her arms around him. “I’m here if you need to talk. Always.”

“Yeah, okay thanks mom.”

“It’s just the thing is...” He says a moment later and Alma smiles to herself, relieved that he is still the same boy who will always eventually talk when he is ready because that’s her son always needing to talk it through. “... it’s like that movie 50 First Dates. You know the one?” Alma nods at the familiar title because her son who unashamedly loves romantic comedies has made her watch it many times.

“Well it’s literally exactly like the movie, except that Tess already knows and loves me. Except that’s almost worse, right? Because I already know how good it is loving Tess, but we will always be stuck in between because I was too stupid to tell her before. And honestly I don’t know if I could do that everyday let alone every ten minutes. And I love her mom. I really love her and I can’t even begin to imagine my life without her. But, she won’t even be able to remember the baby when its born and I just don’t think I’m strong enough to deal with all that. To make her remember everyday or god forbid I start to resent her. I just don’t even know what to do anymore, especially because it’s not just me and Tess anymore, but there’s another life in our hands.” Scott lets out an exasperated sigh after he finally gets everything off of his chest.

“Scott.” His mother finally says. “You’re the strongest man I know and you and Tess have been through so much and have come out on top. I can’t believe this will be any different. And I know it’s impossible not to think about it, but the doctor said that in most cases the short term memory loss is temporary. So I think for now, even though it’s hard, you need to forget all of these worries and just spend time with Tess. Do the thing you have wanted to do for weeks. Talk to her. I know it’s hard, but Scott you have to believe that everything will be okay.”

“Thanks mom. Not just for that, but for everything. Coming here, dealing with my crap, it means a lot.” Scott says while embracing Alma into a hug.

“Always. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

After awhile Kate and Jordan walk out of Tessa’s hospital room. They look happy despite the clear lack of sleep they have gotten over the last few weeks.

“How is she?” Alma questions.

“She’s doing good, much better.” Kate responds back. “It’s a little hard to keep a conversation and she keeps asking why she’s in the hospital, but other than that she says she seems to be feeling good.”

“We’re going to go back to Tessa’s apartment and freshen up, maybe get a nap in?” Jordan says. “You guys good here?”

“Yeah. I think we’re good. I’m going to head in there now.” Scott replies. Jordan and Kate nod and bid their farewells as Scott mentally prepares to go into Tessa’s room.

He takes a deep breath and opens up the door. It’s different in the room now that Tessa is awake, almost lighter. He looks up to see her staring out the window, laying on her bed. The door slams shut and she turns around, started by the sudden noise. Her face lights up when she notices him. She smiles that smile that Scott loves. The one that’s reserved just for him. Not for her sister, not her mom, not the media, but for him. Her green eyes sparkle in the afternoon light and he fights every urge in his body to go over there and kiss her.

“Scott!” Tessa explains excitingly, like she didn’t just see him an hour ago because of course she doesn’t remember that.

“Come here.” She says laughing. “I’ve missed you.”

“Me too Tess. You have no idea.” Scott replies as he wraps her into a right embrace. He leans down and snuggles into her neck, breathing in her scent. God has he missed this. Even though everything isn’t exactly normal at the moment, this feels normal. It feels right. Hugging has always been their way to get in sync before going onto the ice and that’s exactly what its doing right now, bringing them together. After a few minutes, Tessa is the first to speak.

“Scott. I need to tell you something.” Tessa sighs.

“Of course Tess. What is it?” Except Scott knows exactly what it is.

“I’m pregnant. And I know we’re aren’t exactly together together or whatever and I know this is unexpected, but I’m excited and it’s okay if you’re not, but…”

“Tessa, of course I’m excited.” Scott replies smiling and squeezes her hand before continuing. “I’m going to love you and this baby forever, no matter what.”

He knows that in a few minutes she’ll remember none of this, but it’s important that in some way he tells her this.

“I love you so much.” Tessa says with tears in her eyes.

“I love you too. So much. You are always worth the wait.”

They kiss and Scott wishes he could pause this moment and stay here forever. He desperately wishes that maybe her memory is back and she won’t forget this.

Except, a few minutes later he is forced back into reality when Tessa again asks him why she is in the hospital and Scott tries not to look so disappointed.

They spend the rest of their afternoon like that. Tessa asking why she’s here and then continuing to inform him that she’s pregnant and they admit their love to one another. Don’t get him wrong, of course Scott loves to tell Tessa that he does in fact love her, except after about the tenth time it starts to get hard. And now he’s upset with himself because it hasn’t even been a day and he is starting to lose hope.

He stays with her while she starts to fall asleep and finds his own eyes beginning to fall. He climbs into her bed, at her request, and he falls asleep there hoping that when she wakes up she won’t freak out too much and accidentally push him off the bed.

* * *

The sun shines through the dull hospital room, making it less depressing and Scott opens his eyes to meet the light.

Thankfully he wakes up before Tessa. He decides to go down to the cafeteria and get some coffee while she is still sleeping.

While sitting at a table he scrolls through blogs talking about short term memory loss. He happens to come upon a post that has some suggestions for memory retention. He scrolls through the post and smiles when he finds the perfect suggestion.

He walks back into Tessa’s room with a pen and a stack of post it notes. Kate, Jordan, and Alma give him a weird look and he tells them that they will have to wait and see.

“Scott! I’ve missed you!” Tessa says smiling.

“Hi Tess. I’ve missed you too.” He says quickly, trying to focus on the task at hand.

“Where am I?” She asks.

“You’re in the hospital Tess.” Scott says and writes it on a post it note before sticking it on the table in front of her. “You were in an accident, but you’re okay now.”

He rights ‘you were in an accident, okay now’ on another post it note, sticking it by the other.

“And that’s about the hundredth time you’ve asked that because you have seemed to have lost your short term memory.” He says while writing ‘lost short term memory’ in another post it.

“So let me guess.” She says her face not exactly sad, but not happy either. “I’ve told you I’m pregnant already.”

He nods and adds that to another post it with Scott loves you. Tessa smiles when she sees the second note and tells him she loves him too, which he adds to the collection.

Ten minutes and a whole lot of post it notes later, Scott thinks he has finally written down everything that will be useful until she gets her memory back. Now they all wait for Tessa’s memories from the last ten minutes to disappear and see if their system works.

A moment later, Tessa again asks where she is and Scott points to the first post it, ‘you’re in the hospital’, and she reads the rest of them. Before she loses her memory again they all have what seems like a normal conversion in a situation that is far from normal.

* * *

This new normal continues and all seems to be going well until a day later when the other shoe drops.

It’s been what seems like a million times that Tessa has forgotten and then remembered when Scott finally loses it.

“Yes Tessa.” Scott spits, now standing. “For the thousandth time you are in the hospital and yes I love you.”

“I’m sorry, Scott it’s just that I can’t remember and I hate that I can’t remember.” Tessa says holding back tears. Scott immediately feels horrible and goes over to hug her. He know she’s trying hard to remember and he knows that this is extremely confusing and that this seems to be her new life, but it’s his life too.

“I’m sorry Tess. I’m so sorry.” Scott whispers to Tessa and Kate, Jordan, and Alma leave to give them some privacy.

They hug in silence and even if Tessa can’t make new memories right now, Scott knows that she still has the old ones and can tell when he isn’t saying something he wants to.

“Tell me Scott, what is it?”

“Nothing. It’s nothing.”

“Scott Moir.” She shouts. “I may not be myself right now, but I can still tell when you’re lying to me after 21 years. So spill it. I promise I won’t get mad. It’s not like I’ll remember in ten minutes anyway.” He scoffs, clearly not calm from his outburst a minute ago.

“You really want to know what I’m thinking?” She nods. “Fine I’m thinking about how I love you so much and now we have this baby coming, but I can’t even be excited about it because you can’t remember anything. And I love you, I love you so much it hurts and it also hurts that you can’t remember that. And I don’t know how long I can keep doing this before it starts to mean nothing. But, now we have the baby to think about and it’s not just us and I could never leave you, but it would hurt even worse if I started to resent you and I just don’t know what to do.” He's yelling now and he knows he should quiet down, but he can’t stop now.

“And everyone keeps telling me, ‘Scott it’s going to be okay’ and ‘Scott you need to be there for Tessa and the baby’. But, what about me! What about what I want.” He’s angry and not really even at Tessa, but more angry at the world because how did he end up here. Out of all the scenarios he came up with in his head, this was certainly not one of them. And now she’s angry and she said she wouldn’t get angry and now he’s even more angry because he’s always had a temper.

“Why don’t you just leave me then.” She yells. “Put both of us out of our misery.”

“Did you even listen to a word I said Tessa.” He screams back. “I can’t leave you.”

“Fine then why don’t you just leave the room and come back when I forget this happened in what two minutes?” She scowls looking at the clock.

“Fine whatever.” Scott states as he walks out of the room.

He doesn’t want to be angry it’s the last thing he wants to do. He would rather be with Tessa and talk about their baby, their future, but that isn’t exactly an option right now so he goes outside to take a walk and cool off.

* * *

Tessa’s angry. No scratch that she’s furious. It’s not like she wants to keep forgetting. And she knows that Scott’s trying his best and the post it notes were a great idea and he’s been so sweet, apart from now, but she can’t help but be angry, especially after what he just said.

If she could just get out of this damn bed and get some fresh air, maybe she could calm down a bit. Except she’s been stuck in this stuffy room ever since she woke up and no one will let her out.

Jordan appears in the room and Tessa sighs in relief as she now has someone to vent to.

“Can you believe Scott.” Tessa scoffs. “The nerve that man has coming in here and yelling at me like it’s my fault that all this happened.”

“He’s trying his best Tessa.” Jordan urges. “We all are.”

“I know, I know.” She sighs. “It’s just he comes in here and tells me how much he loves me, but then proceeds to yell at me, saying he can’t leave me, but doesn’t want to end of resenting me and how we have to think about the baby and is basically acting like it’s all my fault or I don’t care about what’s going on. But it’s my life too, not just his. I am the one in the hospital bed. Aren’t I?”

“Okay. Where is it?” Jordan says.

“Where is what?” Tessa says a little louder than she meant too, but she’s mad because Jordan has completely ignored her whole speech.

“The post it note.” Jordan replies. “The one that says all of that stuff about what Scott said.”

“There isn’t one.” Tessa says simply.

“When was Scott last here?” Jordan questions.

“About 20 minutes ago and then he bolted like a coward.” Tessa’s says still angry, but realizing what she just said changes everything.

“Tessa.” Jordan says seriously. “You remembered.”

“I remembered.” Tessa says, her eyes open wide.

“I remembered.” She repeats. This time louder and with a smile on her face.

“You remembered. Oh my god you remembered.” Jordan says while embracing Tessa, both now standing and jumping up and down. At that moment Scott walks back into the room.

“Tessa I’m sorry. I just…” but Scott stops speaking when he sees what the two sisters are doing. “What’s going on?”

“You yelled at me.” Tessa says.

“What are you talking about Tessa.” Scott replies confused.

“You yelled at me and said that you could never leave me, but you don’t want to resent me and I remember. I remember Scott!” She shouts happily and watches Scott’s face as he realizes what she just said. They look at each other, not breaking eye contact, something they do so often on the ice.

“Tessa.”

“Scott.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for sticking around for this roller coaster! The last chapter will be angst free with lots and lots of fluff, I promise!


	7. You Don't Have To Dance Alone Anymore

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took awhile to update. I was on vacation so I didn't have time to write, so thanks for sticking with me! I had so much fun writing this last chapter and it is full of fluff, so I hope you all enjoy!

**August 11th, 2018**

It’s been six weeks since Tessa has left the hospital. She was just cleared in the last week and is now perfectly healthy and sporting a small, but obvious baby bump at twelve weeks pregnant.

When she arrived home from the hospital, her and Scott decided that it would be best if he moved in with her so he could keep an eye on her recovery and for the baby of course (and they have basically been living together for awhile now so what’s the difference?).

Ever since she first arrived though, Scott has been incredibly sweet, always making sure she has what she needs and constantly checking up on her health. She lets him take care of her while offering thank you kisses in return. It’s so much easier now that all of their feelings are out in the open. She can kiss him whenever she feels like it, not just when they’re in bed. She can snuggle up next to him on the couch without feeling like she’s crossed any boundaries. And she can sleep by his side every night. There’s no one she’d rather be doing this with and for that she’s so incredibly grateful to have him by her side everyday and she knows that he will be an incredible father to their baby.

Scott’s always been like that, good with kids. Whether it be a kid at the skating rink, a little fan that wants a picture or one of his nieces or nephews. However, Tessa isn’t uncomfortable around kids per say, but she just isn’t as comfortable as he is. At various points in her life, for whatever reason, Tessa didn’t really think she had a maternal bone in her body. Now, she can hardly believe she ever thought that. She is ecstatic that she gets to be a mother. Heck she already is a mother, even though the baby isn’t even born yet. Now that she literally has someone else’s life in her hands she finally understands what it means to love someone in such a great capacity. Sure she loves Scott more than anything, but as she’s finding out that there’s nothing greater than the love you feel for your child (and she’s pretty sure Scott would agree).

Of course she still fears about how good of a mother she’ll be and has realized a newfound fear of bringing her child into the world after having been with her for so many months, but that fear is taken away when she sees glimpses of their little family.

When Scott first started talking to her stomach Tessa was opposed. She thought it was silly and hadn’t really seen a point to it. Scott insisted that their daughter needs to hear her father's voice. In which Tessa shot back, “Oh, so you think the baby will be a girl?”

“Oh yes.” Scott had replied. “A mini you.”

She eventually gave in and each time Scott bends down and whispers to her stomach, she can’t help but smile and think about how happy she is to be a family with Scott and their baby. And now she even finds herself talking to their baby, however she finds herself still calling the baby he or she because even if Scott thinks their baby is a girl she’s not so sure.

Along with Scott’s constant need to update the baby on everything, he has also found the need to place his hands on her stomach constantly. However, Tessa secretly loves this because she loves that their little family can be all connected in some way.

It’s a Saturday morning and Tessa finds herself awake before Scott. This has been the case recently. She’s been so tired during the day that she has been going to bed much earlier than normal and waking up earlier than she normally would. So she now finds herself in the kitchen trying to cook breakfast, eggs and toast of course because she still hasn’t learned how to cook.

As she’s humming to herself while buttering the toast, she feels Scott’s hands wrap around her back as he places them in the middle of her stomach, right where their baby is. He bends down and snuggles his face into her neck and plants a soft kiss.

“Good morning.” Scott says in his raspy morning voice. “How are my girls?”

“We aren’t your _girls_ Scott. Remember we still haven’t found out the sex yet.” She teases him, he’s so keen on it being a girl, but she just isn’t sure yet and she honestly doesn’t care because she already loves this baby so much and whether it’s a boy or a girl won’t change that.

“Ah that’s right.” He jokes before planting a kiss on the side of her head. “What are you guys up to?”

“Well, I couldn’t sleep anymore so we decided to make some breakfast. My world famous eggs and toast.” She replies before winking at Scott.

“Mmm can’t wait!” Scott replies enthusiastically. “I hope you’re not giving your mom too much trouble in there.” Scott leans down and says to the baby. Tessa just laughs and hands him his plate.

“So what’s on the agenda for today?” Scott questions after breakfast.

“I was thinking of sitting on the couch and binge watching Netflix all day. How does that sound?” Tessa asks.

“Perfect.” Scott replies without hesitation.

“Sorry it’s not something too worthwhile for a Saturday, but I’ve been so tired lately.” Tessa explains to Scott as he looks at her lovingly.

“All I need is you and our baby and any day is worthwhile.” Scott replies and if this was anyone else Tessa would question how serious they were. But this is Scott and he’s changed so much through the years, but what has remained the same is his love for her and there’s no doubt in her mind that Scott loves her and their baby with his whole heart. Tessa gets up from her chair and walks over to where Scott is sitting in his. She gently puts both her hands on his cheeks and gives him a sweet, but meaningful kiss.

“I love you.” She says after they break apart. “So much.”

“I love you more.” He replies, always a competition between them.

“Prove it then Moir.” She laughs.

“Oh I plan too.” Comes his reply. “For the rest of my life.”

* * *

  **September 5th, 2018**

“Tessa Virtue.” A voice calls and Tessa and Scott both rise and head hand in hand towards the nurse that called Tessa’s name.

They are back at the hospital to get an ultrasound for their baby and Tessa couldn’t be more excited.

The nurse leads them towards the room and asks Tessa a few questions before going to get the doctor.

“Hello, Tessa and Scott it’s good to see you both.” The doctor remarks. “How has the pregnancy been so far?”

“It’s been good.” Tessa replies cheerfully. “Besides feeling tired all the time, it’s been great.” She looks over at Scott and he smiles while reassuringly squeezing her hand.

“Yes, unfortunately you will be feeling tired, especially in this stage of your pregnancy, but it’s great to hear everything else has been going well.” The doctor replies. “So would you like to know the sex of the baby?”

“Yes!” Tessa and Scott both say in sync. They both don’t really like surprises so it was a natural decision to make.

“Okay great. Tessa this will feel a little cold.” The doctor says.

Scott plants a kiss to Tessa’s forehead and moves his hand that isn’t holding hers to the spot where he kissed her a second ago. They both wait in anticipation as the doctor looks at the screen. Finally, they hear the heartbeat and the doctor turns the screen towards them so they can see their baby. _Their baby_. Tessa loves to say that. They both smile wide and don’t dare take their eyes off the little human on the screen.

“Congratulations.” The doctor says. “You’re having a girl.”

Scott was right, of course it’s a girl. Tessa looks up at Scott and he’s beaming at her and she smiles the biggest grin she can manage.

“Ha I was right.” He says before grabbing her face and kissing her on the lips.

“Yeah, yeah.” She replies back laughing.

“Wow I can’t believe it though.” She says more seriously. “We are having a baby.”

“A baby girl.” He replies, kissing her again.

Later that night when they are cleaning up dinner, Tessa senses that Scott is anxious. She isn’t sure why because they have just found out this incredible news that they are having a girl, but it must be something big if it’s taking away from his excited feelings from earlier that day.

She tries to turn her attention away from his anxiousness, but she can’t. As she’s washing the dishes he is supposed to be drying, but she notices him just standing with the towel and a plate in hand, staring off into space.

“Scott.” She coos. “Earth to Scoooott.” When he still doesn’t reply, she resorts to alternate methods.

“Scott.” She playfully yells as she throws a handful of bubbles at him.

“Hey.” He says finally acknowledging her.

“Finally got your attention.” She replies.

“Sorry I was just thinking.” He says back to her.

“Maybe you can think about this.” Tessa says while laughing and throwing another handful of bubbles at him.

“Oh you’re gonna get it.” He shouts while taking an armful of bubbles and throwing them at Tessa. She retaliates by taking another handful and rubbing them in his hair.

“Tess. Come on it takes hours to get my hair to look this perfect before you ruined it.” He jokes sarcastically. “Guess I’ll just have to return the favor.”

“Don’t you dare.” Tessa says seriously. Scott doesn’t listen, but rather gathers Tessa into his arms and puts the bubbles from his hair onto Tessa’s hair. They end up laughing in each other’s arms, until the laughter silences and they are left looking at each other. Tessa leans into kiss him, but Scott breaks them apart.

“Wait here.” He says quickly. “I’ll be right back.” Tessa is left confused as Scott runs out of the kitchen in the direction of their bedroom. As he runs back into the kitchen she notices he is holding a black box, but before she can ask what it is Scott slips on the floor from the slippery soap.

“Oh my God Scott.” Tessa exclaims. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah I’m fine.” Scott huffs. “Of course I had to fall right now.” Tessa is kind of confused by his remark and gives him her hand to help him up. He takes her hand, but instead of standing up all the way he only goes up on one knee. Tessa lets out a small noise when she realizes what’s happening. Now she knows why he has been acting off.

“Tess.” Scott says quietly. “We have known each other for 21 years and I still find myself wanting to spend every day together. I know our path hasn’t always been easy or traditional, but I couldn't imagine it happening any other way. I want you to know that I will be there for you and the baby no matter what for the rest of my life. I kept wracking my brain for the perfect time to ask this, but it doesn’t matter if it’s the perfect time because there isn’t really a perfect time. It isn’t the time that matters it’s you and me that matter. I love you so much and I want to keep loving you for the rest of my life. So what I’m trying to say is, Tessa Virtue will you marry me?”

“Yes, yes. Of course I’ll marry you Scott.” Tessa exclaims. Normally she’s not an emotional person, but right now she finds that tears are steadily streaming down her face, Scott’s the same.

“I love you so much.” She says breathlessly as Scott puts the ring on her finger.

* * *

  **June 30th, 2020**

Lucy Alma Moir was born on February 20th, 2019 because of course she was. It was a fairly easy birth if you can even call pushing someone out of your body easy, but that’s what everyone told her. Scott was there for her throughout the whole thing, even when she got a little angry at some points, but it was all worth it when she held her daughter for the first time. She thought it couldn’t get any better, but when she handed their daughter over to Scott, her heart melted.

They decided to wait to get married until after Lucy was born, even though they both wanted to get married as soon as possible. They decided to get married the summer after Lucy was born (maybe it wasn’t such a good idea to try and plan a wedding while pregnant and later caring for a newborn baby, but they just couldn’t wait).

It was a beautiful ceremony, everything Tessa always hoped it would be. They agreed to have it outside, near his parents house, surrounded by the beautiful scenery. It was fairly small, the guest list consisting of mostly family and close friends because they knew so many people so inviting everyone they know could have gotten out of hand. It was perfect though. From the ceremony, to the dinner, and to dancing afterwords. Of course there was some teasing from their siblings and the so called bets on their relationship were paid up, but all in all it was a beautiful night that at the end she got to be with one of the most important people in her life.

As she sits in the sand at her cottage reflecting on the last year, she smiles. It’s a warm summer day, just a little over a year since Lucy had been born. She watches as her daughter and her husband play in the cool water, sun beating down. She hears her daughter giggle and her heart swells at the love she feels for her daughter and her husband.

They spend most of their summer weekends here now. The perfect getaway to forget everything else and just be with her family. Sometimes she still can’t believe how lucky she got to be able to spend her life raising a daughter with her best friend. She almost didn’t have this, but she tries her best to forget that and remember what good came out of it.

Tessa is taken out of her thoughts when she feels a wet Lucy jump into her lap.

“Mommy.” Lucy says in her perfect baby voice.

“Hey Luce did you have fun playing in the water with daddy?” Tessa asks her daughter.

“Yes!” Lucy replies happily. “Fun play with Daddy.”

“Yeah we had lots of fun.” Scott says as he walks up to his family.

“Surprise.” Lucy says and Tessa looks at Scott with a confused look on her face.

“Should we show mommy the surprise Luce.” Scott says to their daughter. She nods excitedly and Tessa looks back and forth between Scott and Lucy, still confused.

“Scott what are you…” but she is interrupted by Scott scooping her up in one arm and Lucy in the other as he makes a beeline for the lake. Lucy squeals in delight as Tessa let’s out a scream of her own as she hits the cold water. Scott grins at her with their daughter on his arm as Tessa lays in the water.

“Sorry Tess.” Scott says with a smug look on his face. “Lucy’s idea.”

Lucy and Scott both laugh and are soon joined by Tessa’s own laugh.

“Oh I see so it was Lucy’s idea.” Tessa remarks. “Looks like I’ll have to get her back.”

Tessa grabs her daughter from Scott’s arms and twirls her around in the water so it splashes up onto her little legs. Lucy giggles and tells her mom, more, more.

“Okay Luce.” Tessa replies. “But first we have to get daddy back for throwing me into the water.”

“Get daddy, get daddy.” Lucy says.

“Okay, kick your legs and splash daddy Lucy.” Tessa tells her and Lucy kicks her legs while Scott pretends the water is hurting him.

“Ahh you’re getting me Lucy.” Scott yells. After Lucy stops kicking the water, Tessa uses her free hand to make a big splash that soaks Scott.

“That’s for throwing me into the water.” Tessa tells him smirking.

“I guess we’re even now T.” Scott replies back.

Later, when they are back up at the cottage sitting outside enjoying the view, all wrapped up in towels, Tessa laying on Scott’s chest and Lucy in her arms, she thinks that there’s no place in the world that she’d rather be than here with her family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for sticking with this story and all of the angst. I hope the happy ending was worth it! Thank you all so much for all of your comments and kudos, I really appreciate them! I hope to hear what you thought about this! Thanks! :)


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